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Song Parodies -> "Cola"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Kinks

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Heather Higgins (Malcolm's Daughter!!)

The Lyrics

hello. i am the daughter of malcolm higgins. i realize i have some pretty big shoes to fill, and i will try my best. give me a break, this is my first parody, and i'm only sixteen!!
i bought it in a bar down in old soho
where theres no champagne, all they sell is co-co-co-cola
c-o-l-a cola
the taste in my mouth made me jump up and dance
the bouncer asked for my name and in a bubbly voice i said cola
c-o-l-a cola co-co-co-coka cola

now my tolerance for alcohol is not high
so i drink coke to keep a really stiff spine
oh my coka. co-co-co-co cola
well i'm not dumb but i can't understand
why i talk like a guy but drink like women
oh my coka. co-co-co-co cola.

i drank my coke and danced all night
and once i even had a sprite
i slid across the floor on just my knees
and got the drunk girls to come home with me
well i'm not the worlds most passionate guy
and when i looked at her thighs i wished i'd drank more than cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
i pushed her away
i walked out the door
and fell to the floor
i begged, oh, please
why did i look at her and she at me?

and thats the way that i want it to stay
and i always want to drink that way
just my coka. co co co co cola.
there will be rum and there will be coke
its a mixed up muddled up shook up joke
i drink my cola. co co co co cola.

wel i'd left home just a week before
and i'd never ever had a drink before
i sat with my cola in my hand
and said 'add the rum and make me a man!!'

well i'm not a crazy drunken yollder
i know what i am, i a tea-totaller
i'll stick to cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola
co-co-co-co cola co-co-co-co cola

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   2

User Comments

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Peregrin - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
Not a bad start, Heather! I like the Sprite line particularly.
Johnny D - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
Congratulations on your first parody, Heather - you sure take after the old man! This parody's sweet!
Royce Miller - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
I liked the line about the thighs--
Diva - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
Very very good Heather! This was excellent for a first parody! =)
T.J. Spindler - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
Well, it looks like you're gonna be as great at parody making as your dad! Great first parody, and welcome to!!! I look forward to reading you're parodies in the future! PS: How old are you? I'm only 10 years old, and my first parody was "Skaters Paradise" but it sucked! Lol! tj out
Rick D - October 29, 2003 - Report this comment
Hi Heather. I have a girl your age, and I'd think she'd rather give up her cell phone than follow in my footsteps, So I love it when a girl actually admires her Dad. My only question is, do you ever see him when he's not perusing songs and hunched over the keyboard mocking them? When does he have time to pay any attention to you, watch what you eat, see how you dress, criticise your boyfr.. ........Oh wait. Now I know why you get along with your Dad.
Grimley Fieendish - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice parody & very close to the original... A minor piece of trivia about the original, is that the BBC had to censor it to remove the reference to Coca-Cola, when it was performed on Top Of The Pops in the mid 70's, as they considered it "product placement", which is still effectively forbidden under U.K advertising rules, & replaced the offending part of the lyric with "Cherry Cola"... Needless to say as Coca-Cola now does a cherry version, what would they replace "Cherry Cola" with...?

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