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Song Parodies -> "Jerk Named Doctor House"

Original Song Title:

"Burning Down The House"

Original Performer:

Talking Heads

Parody Song Title:

"Jerk Named Doctor House"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Go! Watch him!
He’s angry as a badger
Hugh Laurie’s the name of the actor
In the coronary wing
You’ll find Doctor House

He’s bright
He has got all the answers
Not quite
You’re sick but he needs deader
When you think you’re near the grave
Then saves Doctor House!

Pops Vicodin, Grabs his cane
He keeps limpin’ through the ward
His aggravation is clear
Might seem rough, mocks your head scar
You got juggling pickle jars
“You’ll look like Harry Potter!”

But don’t sweat
If you have got a sore throat
Put down: “You shouldn’t swallow that knife”
“Come back when you’ve got a disease”
Jerk named Doctor House

If you just need a neck brace
He’ll call you a pain in the neck!
Maybe spray you with mace
I’m telling you the man’s a jerk
But you’ll be fixed on your death bed
While you’re getting called names

Jerk named Doctor House!

With House
Safe from the cemetery
Guess right
Though it seems cockamamie
Pulls strings for some impossible feats
That’s our Doctor House

Those black and British guys help thwart
Any illness that is a threat
The blonde babe helps to render
I tell ya that’s why I’m obsessed
With eyes glazed at the TV set
It has got me so wired!

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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Porfle Popnecker - November 03, 2011 - Report this comment
DKTOS (show, not song), but funny parody!
Michael Pacholek - November 03, 2011 - Report this comment
I don't have a laughter management problem -- I have a laughter problem! But, seriously, I don't know whether to commend or smack you for writing a "House" parody that doesn't mention the lupus trope! It's like writing about Jennifer Lopez (or Kim Kardashian) and mentioning some other part of her anatomy! Hmmmm, wonder what would happen if either of them guested on "House."
Matthias - November 04, 2011 - Report this comment
I'm sorry but what is the "lupus troupe"? The only Lupus I know of is "Night of the Lupus" and that has to deal with killer rabbits so that can't be what you're talking about.
Agrimorfee - November 04, 2011 - Report this comment
It is hard to write a parody based on things one is not overly familiar with. I have only seen maybe 5 or 6 episodes, so I got the gist. Problem here was just some really off the wall lines--"He needs deader", "You'll look like Harry Potter"...???
Matthias - November 04, 2011 - Report this comment
"He needs deader" is in reference to the patient always getting much, much worse before he actually fixes them. It always happens in every episode of House (because it raises suspense but its still a trope worth mocking). Also "You'll look like Harry Potter" is in reference to him mocking some guy's head scar (although it would be something Dr. Cox would ways from Scrubs a bit more than Dr. House would say).
Christie Marie M - November 19, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Never seen "House" but I still enjoyed your parody. I just Googled "Dr House" He sure looked like a devil, so I'm going to take your word for it that he's a jerk. Make that the 3rd psycho that I read about. Psycho Kitty, Angie, and Dr House should participate in the "Psycho" olympics and whoever gets the gold would win an all expenses paid trip to the mental institution!
Rex - November 20, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I've never seen the show, so the lyrics came off as a bit disjointed, but a nice tribute, and we finally discover in the last verse why you really watch...
bobpiecheese - November 20, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I haven't seen the show, but I know enough about it that I thoroughly enjoyed it! Maybe I should show it to my brother who's been watching House recently (he likes to bring up when the two syndromes I have (Asperger and Guillame-Barre turn up), he should love it too. Also, Michael's referencing the running gag of lupus being considered for the diagnosis and House saying that it's never lupus. 555!
Below Average Dave - November 21, 2011 - Report this comment
Reads a tad clunky Matty, to be honest, not like the days of "blowing man kind" clunky, but clunky. . .I have seen a few episodes, he's so ridiculous there is no way in hell a doctor like him would have a reputation like he does in his show in real life, I've never been a big fan of his. Anyhow, decent parody (though I'm not sure why you bring the real actor's name in when the majority of the parody takes place in the world of Dr. House, not the actor) I digress. . .decent parody
Blaydeman - November 21, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Love the show, love the OS, love, love, love, love, love. It was a little clunky to me too, but not enought to penalize you. I liked it a lot!

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