Each time I turn around and look, you're gone
Somewhere, I swear.
You're playing cat and mouse with me
Each time I call,
I know I'll get your "Grandma died" routine again.
Is there something I should know about?
Why do you make me scream and shout?

I know that frogs' a**holes are watertight
And the bear sh**s in the woods tonight.
Whoa, oh, but I know you're runnin' away from me.

I know that frogs' a**holes are watertight
And a chicken does have lips, alright
But honey, I can tell. You think that I'm a guy from Hell.
I don't leave so easily.
Not gettin' away from me.

Your bodyguard says that you are out again.
Somewhere, out there, protection order from the court.
You think that I'm a jerk.
You've hid someplace where I can't get to you.
You think I can't find you but don't forget
Haven't exactly lost you yet.

I know that frogs' a**holes are watertight
And the bear sh**s in the woods tonight.
Whoa, oh, but I know you're runnin' away from me.

I know that frogs' a**holes are watertight
And a chicken does have lips, alright
But honey, I can tell. You think that I'm a guy from Hell.
I don't leave so easily.
Not gettin' away from me.

Do you expect me to really stop?
Why do you cry and call the cops?

You know these handcuffs are on really tight
And I'm sleeping at the jail tonight
Whoa, oh, but I know it's best you're away from me.

I know somehow I've got to see the light
And accept my actions are not right
But honey, I can tell. You know the pattern much too well.
You don't fool so easily.
Stayin' away from me.

I'll do anything to stop this fight
And you're where you need to be tonight.
Whoa, oh, it's still best you're stayin' away from me.