She's moaning in another world
And buzzing off another heart
Making beds shake, making loins quake

They come in seven packages
From diamond hard to ruby fuzz, they make her cry
Heaven help her when she's dry

The diamond hard is her love boy
She fills her space with slippery paste and maximum toy
Battery lights and electric nights
When she requires hardware desire for higher heights

No place for virgins or the tired and bored
When satisfaction's left to chance
Forget about pumping, just plug in the cord

She had to ask
For a smooth ocillator
Smooth ocillator

Coast to coast, shipped LA to Chicago, urgent mail
Rushed north and south, made in Key Largo, dong for sale

She rubs her face with its plastic case
Fresh from the box, untroubled lust
She loves the taste

A rocket to love, a throttle to hold
Turns all of your memories to missiles of gold
The last one in the window's already been sold

So please don't ask
About her smooth ocillator
Smooth ocillator

No need for goats shipped from Chicago via mail
Sent north and south, abused in Key Largo, schlong for sale
Her cat's taken care of, that fish is a whale

Smooth ocillator..