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Song Parodies -> "Damn Tofu Turkey"

Original Song Title:

"Talk Dirty To Me"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Poison

Parody Song Title:

"Damn Tofu Turkey"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

I've tried tofu turkey before, it's not bad it tastes like turkey flavored Jello... My friend Katie is actually a vegetarian, so this one goes out to her.
You know for dinner
A burger and fries would be good
But I rather eat a piece of wood
Than these carrots
And you say you like this stew
That’s made with fresh tofu
This rubbery brew
That I must chew

I hunger
For taters and a t-bone steak
I’m sick of veggies on this plate
I can’t eat roots
And tomatoes can’t relate
To bacon, that is true
I’m going to lunch soon

Kate, Don’t you feed me…
Baked onionskins
Dropped the knife and fork
Won’t touch the lettuce
All those beans, I’ll ignore
Like the cavemen
Munch on beef and pork
Please Katie…
No Tofu Turkey!!!

You know I call dudes
Like Papa John's and Dominoes
Because the crap you make is gross
That pumpkin smeared goo
That just tastes absurd to me
In vegetable chili
It makes me fear you

What Katie you eat…
Tastes like “Poison”
Peas and corn you’ve poured
You won’t eat fishes
They were alive once before
It’s my lament
Food that you adore
It’s worse than
Damn Tofu Turkey!

Emirl please hop in your car and come cook for me!!!

Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Ewwwww!!!!

I’d much rather be…
In the Drive-Thru
Inside a Food Court
Perhaps at Sonny’s
Where I buy that pulled pork, pork, PORK!!!!
At the Ball Game
I’ll eat hotdogs galore
Please Katie…
Don’t feed that to me!

Yuck!

But Katie…
That tastes disgusting!

Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

No Katie!
No Tofu Turkey!!!

Burp!

Ewwwwwwww…

“Meat’s the food that I like Katie”
Oh-Yeah!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Jeff Reuben - December 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Really the first comment...wow, guess it's the Christmas lull. Good song, I like the OS...could never bring me to eat a Tofu Turkey though :)
Tim Hall - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
I had a Tofurky for the first time today - pretty good tasting.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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