Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Every Toe Has Its Corn"

Original Song Title:

"Every Rose Has It's Thorn"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Poison

Parody Song Title:

"Every Toe Has Its Corn"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Reuben

The Lyrics

I brought you Vaseline lotion so your skin wouldn't dry
But as I rubbed it on your ankles, I had to hold my lunch inside
Now I thought you were cute, my heart was afire!
As I gazed into your eyes.
But your feet smell like cat poo, so we're through!
But I guess that's why they say:

E-E-E-very toe has it's corn!
Just like every beer has it's foam!
Just like every rhino has to toot her own horn!
Every toe has it's corn! Yeah, it does.

I saw my baby's car break down, on the way to Dr. Shoal's
Heard the doctor say, "Life's a game of easy come and, easy tow"
Then he made fun, of your bunion, and he laughed about your cyst.
But you know I would have kept you 'round if I , could have kept from
looking down! I guess:

E-E-E-very toe has it's corn!
Just like every beer has it's foam!
Just like every rhino has to toot her own horn!
Every toe has it's corn!

Warts and in-grown toenails...they must cause you so much pain!
Like a blister that's popped, yeah, the wound heals, but the skin, that skin
remains!

You know I would have sold our soles that night for some...Tinactin spray
Instead of making love, I just...made you go away
And now I...hear you think I'm mean and crude
And that I'm just another callous dude
But it just tore me up inside, when I saw those feet all...cracked and
dried! I guess:

E-E-E-very toe has it's corn!
Just like every beer has it's foam!
Just like every plantar, has to grow her own wart!
Every toe has it's corn!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 83

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   4
 4
 4
 
 2   2
 1
 0
 
 3   2
 5
 6
 
 4   6
 11
 6
 
 5   69
 62
 67
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Ghetto John - January 17, 2003 - Report this comment
dude i just listened to this song in the message board it was truly worthy of LOL!
PF4Eva - January 18, 2003 - Report this comment
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard the WAV file. You inspired me to (although I haven't done so yet) write a parody called "Every Ghost Has Been Warned" for my Ghostbusters musical. You are the next Weird Al. Keep it up!
Jeff Buchoff - January 18, 2003 - Report this comment
Thank you! I look forward to Every Ghost Has Been Warned (good idea!)
John Jenkins - April 19, 2003 - Report this comment
I just found this parody from seeing its high ranking on Mike Florio's Top 100. Very funny! Great line - "Easy come, easy tow."
Michael Pacholek - April 19, 2003 - Report this comment
Would this be considered "sole music"? I consider it pretty good. If you want to join the parody masters' club, you now have one foot in the door. This song looks good from any ankle. Just remember, time wounds all heels, and that's not just a ligament of my imagination. (Mike gets slapped by Meriadoc so he'll stop with the awful puns.) Thanks, Doc, I needed that.
Meriadoc - May 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Checking this out for the ABCs. I'd heard this was a masterpiece and I concur! 'Sole'! 'Callous'! Hilarious!
Paul Robinson - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Jeff, I'llI have to see if I can download that later on. DKTOS for now.
Johnny D - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Toe be or not toe be! Good job.
Agrimorfee - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC)Toe-tally sick! Good job.
Paul Robinson - May 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Jeff - Listened to the sound file. Very, very funny. Nice job. 5's. This makes the "E" contest more difficult to decide now.
Peregrin - May 26, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent parody. It's certainly not at the foot of my pile!
Spaff.com - May 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent sendup of a power ballad that's absolutely corny (heh heh). Some great puns, too, "callous" being my fave. Now if you could just get those dumbass backup singers to sing the right words...
Jeff Reuben - May 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah Spaff, I hate those guys!
MysteryGoat - May 29, 2004 - Report this comment
You know, it was the listening to the actual recording that made that much funnier. :-)
Claude Prez - May 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Toe-riffic. Ya know I love the puns.
martha - May 30, 2004 - Report this comment
So funny .... LOL
Arwen - November 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Oh Jeff! I TOTALLY have a thing about feet. I'm very wary of them, to tell the truth. That having been said, this is FABulous! My favorite (cringing all the while) bit was the blister skin line! Bleah!! =) 5s, Buddy!
Ashkicksass - November 12, 2004 - Report this comment
I have a thing about feet too. Y'know Eddie Murphy's character in Boomerang? I can totally relate. I may have gagged my way through, but it was a masterpiece nonetheless.
Wouldn't U Like 2 NO - March 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I like beef.
Below Average Dave - January 24, 2010 - Report this comment
Well, you already know I love this one Jeff, I was in Tampa for the 'live' rendition, and it is just one of those that are so bizarre, that you can't help but laugh
Matthias - February 02, 2010 - Report this comment
This is one of your classics by far. Feetastic!
Jack Wilson - February 09, 2010 - Report this comment
Love it! 5s
bobpiecheese - February 10, 2010 - Report this comment
(Genre Hero) Kinda gross, but very well written. 555!
lilCougaress - February 10, 2010 - Report this comment
My furry paws on you, LordJeffry ! !
DJ Blaze - February 11, 2010 - Report this comment
Very good, and very grossout. 555, and the OS is epic.
Bob O'Mara - October 01, 2012 - Report this comment
Just made my own to this song and got curious about other versions. This beats mine to the ground! Hilarious! 5-5-5!

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/80s/poison0.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 853