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Song Parodies -> "I Did Stand-up In A Feminist Bar"

Original Song Title:

"I Don't Wanna Be A Rock 'n' Roll Star"

Original Performer:

Peer Günt

Parody Song Title:

"I Did Stand-up In A Feminist Bar"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

This stand-up dude has a really crappy booking agent:

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.
Where are the guys? There's not even a fag!
But many freaks and ugly gals
The best ones all look like nasty trolls
Here is something wrong!

I think this gig here is not what it should be
My set of jokes they do not agree
But here's the main thing, I need the pay
My manager's a douche!

I'm the pre-show in a feminist bar
Dick jokes are downers up front so far
I'm a warm-up to the SCUM* manifest'
God, let me leave alive with my testes!

There is a grandma in a butch brazziere
From yore, not the very first time
The hotel behind of here
Is called the Beaver Fair

Red lights get in my eyes
It blows that I need the dough
And if boos could wear me down
I'd now be 4'1 (="four and one")

I do stand-up in this feminist bar
Crack jokes won't get me beer, only scars
I'm so out of place and luck that it sucks
Just wanna get my sixtynine bucks

[Guitar solo - as the song switches to past tense]

I kept ducking, as that torment went on
And I was planning escape routes half-time
All those navy cuts and butch cigars
No, I got no laughs, just scars

I did stand-up in a feminist bar
Boob puns was juggled way under par
I was called a fucking chauvinist shame
Just as my hands-on "change" was proclaimed

I bombed stand-up in a feminist bar
Doorkeepers called an ambulance car
I now have a carved #metoo on my chest
But had to leave behind my left teste

© Peter Andersson.

*SCUM = Society for Cutting Up Men - Google it!)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.7
How Funny: 2.7
Overall Rating: 2.7

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 6
 6
 
 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Claude Prez - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
Hmmm...sir, I'm afraid this sort of thing is completely unacceptable in this enlightened day and age -- you can take your toxic masculinity and microaggressions and ALL your other progressive buzzwords and go back to whatever podunk redneck hell they have in, um, Sweden

Also: you said "juggled". Heh heh. Well done. Catchy choruses, but you saved the best one for last IMO.
Matthias - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
I'm sure you'll offend some people with this parody and I'm curious about the s***storm that is about to unfold... Using the word "fag" and thinking that all feminists are nasty men haters... The backlash is going to be interesting. Funny stuff though! For once I think I understood just about every word you said here.
Agrimorfee - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
Very dark material here. It made me think of edgy comics like Lenny Bruce, Bill Hicks and Louis C.K. (who, oh boy, has recently gotten in beeeg trouble for very distasteful real-life shenanigans). 555 and hoping this is isn't the real you at all.
Jeff Reuben - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
Looks like you got a set of feminist 1s!
Peter Andersson - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
I was aiming for something more along the lines of "I'm a redneck in a hipster-y bar // I'll be leaving in an ambulance car" - but the best lines I came up with took me in this somewhat more radical direction before the write was over, ha-ha!
Fat Feminist in a Feminist Bar - November 10, 2017 - Report this comment
"My eggs! My eggs! Above my legs!"

[Al Bundy pastes her with an egg.]

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IY9geMjGAbY]

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