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Song Parodies -> "Kabbalah"

Original Song Title:

"Borderline"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Madonna

Parody Song Title:

"Kabbalah"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

( --- instrumental intro --- )

[ MADONNA: ]

Something in my brain is dumber than wet tea leaves
I don't want to be some has-been, I'll gain me new publicity

Stop saying that I'm lame,
In it just for fame,
Fortune, money, sex, and more

If you watch me you will know
Maybe you will grow,
Horny, like you did before

Lust...thighs, two thunder-glands ( thunder-glands! ) ---
I've given all I can!

Now I'll start my latest thing ---

Kab-balah
Rabbis appalled ask, "Why, Ma--don--na ----
--- do you keep on pissing Jews off --- over the Kab-balah?"

Kab-balah
Feels like I'm growing two new hoo-hahs!
I just keep on pissing Jews off --- over the Kab-balah!
( Kab-balah! )

( --- instrumental --- )

Something in my thighs is wakin' up your tool at me
When you hold me in your mind you rub you 'til you just can't see

But when you wet-dream now
When you look aroused
Ain't me you lust after now

Not buying my CDs!
My Madonna sleaze!
Where my fame was there's just a breeze!

Bust...prize-boob wonder-glands ( wonder-glands! ) ---
I've given all I can!

Now I've got my latest fling ---

Kab-balah
Steal ancient wisdom to lose my blahs!
I just keep on pissing Jews off --- over the Kab-balah!

Kab-balah
Mystical knowing to choose my bras!
I just keep on pissing Jews off --- over the Kab-balah!
( Kab-balah! )

"Esther", that's me!

"Esther", that's me!

"Esther", that's me now-ow!

(She just keeps on --- ) Call me "Esther"!

( --- pissing Jews off --- ) "Esther-Darling"!

( --- over the Kab-balah!) Yeah-eah-eah! ( Kab-balah! )

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   12
 12
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
That's freaky, JD...scary synchronicity there, mate. Absolutely LOVED this, especially "Mystical knowing to choose my bras!"...brilliant. 555
John Barry - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Speaking of brutal, JD! Esther and Ann--both richie, er, richly, deserving targets. Nothing arcane about this: 5s.
alvin rhodes - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
i like the "wet tea leaves" line
MasonR - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
JohnnyD, you and Kristof must have some kind of--dare I say it?--mystical connection today!
Royce Miller - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Johnny, I think the Bonnie Raitt song "Let's Give Em Something to Talk About" is Madonna's theme song.
Red Ant - February 02, 2006 - Report this comment
"Mystical knowing to choose my bras" was my favorite line. Well done skewering here Johnny D.
Rick C - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Like a surgeon, you write! 555
Johnny D - February 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Kristof, JB, alvin, MasonR, Royce, Red Ant, and Rick C.
Larry Hensley - February 05, 2006 - Report this comment
Good one.
Johnny D - February 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry.
tomario - November 09, 2006 - Report this comment
"thunder-glands"lol sounds scary nice reworking 555
Red Ant - November 18, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABCK3) See above, and kudos for using one of Madonna's songs against her!
Matthias - November 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Esther Slayed.... Johnny D has on Resume.... This is how Modanna paid.... Oh, I believe that Esther's Slayed!!!
Agrimorfee - November 20, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3) Allan Sherman: "How's yer cousin Esther? Skipped a whole semester!" Oy vey, Madonna.
Michael McVey - November 21, 2006 - Report this comment
You probably shouldn't give Pri-madonna any ideas (lol).----MM
Kristof Robertson - November 22, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3K) See above. This was even better second time around.
Stuart McArthur - November 22, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC3K) I have a feeling that there are more non-political parodies about Madonna than anyone else, and it's stuff like Kabbalah that warrants it - nice skewering JD - 555

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