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Song Parodies -> "Jackie's Diane"

Original Song Title:

"Jack and Diane"

Original Performer:

John (Cougar) Mellencamp

Parody Song Title:

"Jackie's Diane"

Parody Written by:

Stan Hall

The Lyrics

If Alvin wrote this, I imagine Jack and "Diane" would be Norman and "Mom." :-)
Little snip, hey, makes Jack be “Diane,”
two silicon tits sewn in's his startlin' plan.
Jackie don’t see no hooters scar,
“Diane’s” debut? Flauntin’ her rack (she ain’t Jackie no more!)

Shuckin’ that willie, ah, downsizin’ the testes,
“Diane’s” whittled down Jackie’s lap, got no gland between her knees.
Jackie think, “Hey, “Diane’s” the one you’ll find’s the lady me –
little sausage goes, cob’s forsook, no more pickle and peas.”

Oh yeah, life goes on
Long after Jack’s willy is severed and gone
Oh yeah, life goes on
Long after he’s jilted his rivet and stones.

Jackie is wracked with regrets for a moment,
scratches his head and paws his breasts and screams,
“Hell, you know ‘Diane’, cuttin’em off was a pity.”
“Diane” say, “Baby I, ain’t missin’ those things.”

And then Jackie say …
Oh yeah, life goes on
Long after this quill and kit are all gone
Oh yeah, baby, life goes on
Long after these pills and shiv are all gone

Gone’re his rocks, gone his pole,
down below the belt now’s instead their goal.
Doled out the sex genes all wrong for a man –
changes come and, wow!… real soon Jackie’s “Diane.”

And then Jackie say …
Oh yeah, life goes on
Long after this spiller of semen is gone.
Oh yeah, life goes on
Long after this driller of women is gone

Little ditty ’bout Jack (now “Diane”)
whom surgery made per his request, woman.
© Stan Hall 11/24/2009

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 1
 
 5   5
 6
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Christie Marie M - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Great take on this OS and title switch. Wouldn't be surprised if "Jack" turned into "Diane"! Talk about Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde all over again! Transexually hilarious!!! 555's!
blackjack21 - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Very descriptive, I severed some 5's for you.
Timmy1000 - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Great switch on this song. I guess if Jack is Diane, she/he could go live in a little pink house.
John Barry - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Welcome back, Stan. No more eJackulation for this. . .person.
< ! ! ! > - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
! ! !
Fiddlegirl - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
*Some*one was on a [gender] bender! :)
Stan - November 25, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, everyone, and buon appetito domani.

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