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Song Parodies -> "Santa's Flaws"

Original Song Title:

"Bobby Brown"

Original Performer:

Frank Zappa

Parody Song Title:

"Santa's Flaws"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

Its almost April. This is so out of season. But maybe thats for the better. ;-) Also, someone suggested using deliberate pacebreaks for effect. Im trying that with this one. At one single place in the song. Wasnt really sure how to "present" it though. *Crosses fingers and hopes its clear enough*
Hi there people, Im Santa Claus
They say that these days Im full of flaws
My guts to big, my beard is twisted
I tell little kids that they are not listed

Once I chilled in the northern dark
Im bunking now in a trailer park
I got a toothfairy near, I force to help with the packing
I have to fill the gaps of all the elfs Im lacking

Oh crap, Im now an American bum
I do not think Im striking dumb
But Im a downfallen sonofabitch
I didnt sell my shares in time to be real rich
(Didnt sell, didnt sell, didnt sell out)

The dotcom evolution
came crushing like a revolution
I tell you people, it was a sad day
When some blackfoot elves sold the sleigh on eBay

I had a little fit then
I stamped upon a giftmarked kitten
I raised my voice in affect, but they had joined the mob
Now Mrs Claus a Don and I have shrunk to slob

Oh God, it was just a terrible knock
For days I was in a bloody shock
I was a miserable unjolly man
I drank som gin and whiskey, before I ran
(No wonder, wonder, wonder, wonder)

So I left them and bought me a mobile home
I jingle the bell, wherever I roam
Got a job doing Pokemon promo
And Prancer I sold to a zoodophile homo

(Sampling Public Enemy)
"Base, how low can you go?"
"Base, how low can you go?"
"Base, how low can you go?"
(Repeated suitable number of times before getting back to original pace)

Eventually me and some trolls
Sorta went into biz with inflatable dolls
I can make about a hundred in a regular week
Long as Im not getting sick and weak

Oh God, Im now doing minimum wage
With a foreman on my ass till Im in a rage
And Ill do anything for icecold beer
I stay awake nights puking on my gear

Oh God, Oh God, Im doing crack now
Bumming outs my only flack now
And my name is Santa Claus
Ho, Ho, Ho, Im full of flaws

And my name is Santa Claus
Ho, Ho, Ho, Im full of flaws
And my name is Santa Claus
Ho, Ho, Ho, Im full of flaws

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   2
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rick D - October 26, 2003 - Report this comment
I love this one. Because I hate the overdone Xmas crap, and I love Frank Zappa, and the idea that you used him. He'd approve.

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