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Song Parodies -> "I Guess That's Why They Call it Wal-Mart"

Original Song Title:

"I Guess That's Why They Call it the Blues"

Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"I Guess That's Why They Call it Wal-Mart"

Parody Written by:

Andrew D. Lacroix

The Lyrics

Another work parody. I took a sabbatical to clear my mind in hopes of curing writer's block. I came up with this, hopefully it'll work. "People" and "OK!" are two magazines commonly found at checkout lines.
Wish it went away
It ought to just leave forever
The lines will never, ever go away
Wal-Mart will never get better

Stuck in the mud
Dust out the PEOPLE and OK!
It won't be long before I go along
And we will all quit today

And I guess that's why they call it Wal-Mart
Time on their hands will be time spent in line
Working my a$$ off
Getting no time off
Wanting to blast off
Tell them to f**k off
And I guess that's why they call it Wal-Mart

Pay really does suck
Never much left now in my hands
Can't buy a nice truck
Disappears just like quicksand

Need a break now?
Just ask them for another
You will wish in one hand...
And s**t out in the other (1)

And I guess that's why they call it Wal-Mart
Time on their hands will be time spent in line
Working my a$$ off
Getting no time off
Wanting to blast off
Tell them to f**k off
And I guess that's why they call it Wal-Mart

And I guess that's why they call it Wal-Mart!

(1): From the often known line "You can wish in one hand and crap in the other, and see which fills first." I give credit to the late Burgess Meredith, who pulled out that line in the movie "Grumpier Old Men". Song written 1/3/08 by Andrew D. Lacroix.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Guy - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
I do not envy anyone who has to make a living working for Wally Martinez as it is referred to by a certain demographic group here in South Texas.

So I guess this isn't calling new news.
Agrimorfee - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
My wife, who works for Wally and mostly hates it, will LOVE this. Thanks.
Guy - January 04, 2008 - Report this comment
My son worked a summer in Wal Marts grease pit in the automotive changing tires and oil. I have heard first hand what a wonderful employer they are. NOT!
Andrew D. Lacroix - January 05, 2008 - Report this comment
Guy, Agri, thank you. I got them blues myself today at work putting out meat for customers. I wrote that as a tribute.

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