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Song Parodies -> "Dirty Laundry (Heidi Fleiss Version)"

Original Song Title:

"Dirty Laundry"

Original Performer:

Don Henley

Parody Song Title:

"Dirty Laundry (Heidi Fleiss Version)"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

DKTOS? See the YouTube video here. Inspired by the true story of Heidi Fleiss, who now runs a laundromat in Nevada, aptly called "Dirty Laundry". Thanks to Chucky for the news story link. For the sake of keeping the parody going smoothly, I've eliminated the "kick 'em when..." parts, and the solo would be cut out of a recording as well.
~~~ Dirty Laundry ~~~

I made a livin' givin' people hos
Then I went and got busted - as everyone knows
Now I'm washing all your clothes
At the Dirty Laundry

Well I used to be a madame, but I wound up here
No showgirl in Vegas - I have a new career
Only soap I use is Cheer
At the Dirty Laundry

Say, I never was a bleach blonde, now there's bleach by my side
Cleaning out your skid marks - I don't have any pride
Talk about a changing "Tide"
At the Dirty Laundry

It's a filthy operation... baggin' dryer lint
And this ole' mink, well, I ain't making a mint
Let me bubble subtle hints
At my Dirty Laundry

We can take a spin out on the washing machine
I redefine "MayTag" - I'm the laundromat queen
You will never get me clean!
At my Dirty Laundry

Dirty little dresses - dirty pairs of socks
Dirty little something - from the school of Hard Knocks
But I think outside my box
At the Dirty Laundry

I got the stain remover - for taking out spots
And it "comes in handy" - I have used it a lot
Put six quarters in the slot
At my Dirty Laundry
copyright 2008+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 20

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   19

User Comments

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Matthias - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
I don't know how to vote this, it was a good parody, but the "Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down" part is like the best part of this original song, and cutting it like cutting the heart out of the original song... I'm sure you could have made it work, and I'm surprised the guy who mocked Bob Rivers for cutting his original songs down would ever do a thing like this. I'll wait for your responce to this, but as for right now it was a great parody, and a great idea, and a great OS choice too.
Matthias - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
On 2nd thought I'll vote 455, because the pacing was fine of the part of the song you did, but since you didn't do the whole song I can't give you full credit on pacing.
alvin - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
i hadn't heard that story...too funny
zee - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
Lick 'em when they're up, tickle when they're down ;-)
Agrimorfee - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
Matthias is OTM, but in these situations I give 554.
Ann Hammond - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
enjoy this but you are missing the good part. he he
Jason - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
This is pretty clever. 555
malcolm higgins - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
clean but funny
Below Average Dave - May 19, 2008 - Report this comment
Matty/Agri/ etc already pointed out the missed part, though forgetting a part is a bit different than what Bob Ricci does (you know a quater of the song) so I 5'd out. Funny poke at a fallen star. . .
Red Ant - May 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks to Matt, Alvin, zee, Aggy, Ann, Jason, Malcolm and Dave. Matt: Fair cop there. Those parts are the worst part of an otherwise awesome song for their sheer repetitiveness. I'm sure I could have come up with something to fill in the spaces, but I chose to improve on TOS by eliminating them altogether. For a prime example of how this can work beautifully, check out this link:

MrMacphisto - May 26, 2008 - Report this comment
lol... excellent... I love the OS, and this was so appropriate... 5-5-5
Agrimorfee - June 09, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Really a lot of fun, not really needing to know who Heidi Fleiss was to enjoy it...but on the other hand, Red, I don't want to "kick you when you're up..." ;)
Jason - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
(S.O.T.M.) Well done! Nice and clean I hope!
Matthias - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
Annoyance is in the ear of the beholder you for example don't like "Wannabe" by The Spice Girls or "Fergalicious" while I however do. Just like this "Kick 'em when their up" lines because they are so different than the rest of the song and if you listened to this song without them it would kinda drag on, so although you did explain it I still feel that you could have done something with them, expecially since you're kicking Heidi Fleiss when she's down.
Gianni Parmesiani - June 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Followed along with a video that Henly did for the Clintons live. Wouldn't that have added something to the lyrics? I would have liked to see an attempt at the cut lines; they are part of the song and should have been included, I think. Good stuff, though.
Max Power - June 27, 2008 - Report this comment
Would need 555 cups of Clorox
Guy - June 28, 2008 - Report this comment

Clever bit of subs getting in all those brand name laundry day miracles into the parody. A clean parody - just as I like 'em, that is most of the time.
Tim Hall - June 28, 2008 - Report this comment
Heidi Fleiss's laundromat in in the town of Pahrump in Nye County Nevada. Prostitution is legal in Nye County.
bobpiecheese - June 29, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Could've done without the innuendos, but then it would've been a bit hard to keep the topic going. Whatever. Nice work anyways.
Peter Andersson - June 29, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM - I have a line about poor old Heidi in my own song for this round, can't remember for sure when I learned about who she was, vaguely recalls some romours about a possible swedish connection (via ancestry) when she was busted but I can vouch for that. Anyway, this was good, me like the parody, me like the piece of news it comes from and me like the comment by Tim Hall, I think he's on to something there, he-he. As for the left out part I'm with you there, there can be no rule for it of course but generally I'd say that if a chorus is repeated 3-5 times you try to vary it in the parody but if it's repeated up to ten times you either don't or just cut it out like here, but then again that's just me.
Peregrin - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Found this via comments Jack. Love the OS, and also loved the way you worked Heidi's imaginary situation (or is it real?) into the parody :)
Phil Alexander - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
:-) Fun stuff, Jack.. makes me think, there's sure to be a BOG parody in here:
Heidi Fleiss, Heidi Fleiss
Very naughty... very nice
Your desire? She'll supply a
Girl for any kind of vice :-)
Below Average Dave - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Best Line: "Cleaning out your skid marks - I don't have any pride Talk about a changing "Tide"". . . that got a good laugh. One thing to add to our conversation is that in this particular OS I remember the song by that chorus, I guess I'd have to hear a recording to really see this having staying power, but the idea was executed flawlessly in the verses, don't know how much of a factor to consider the purposely eft out choruses as I'm not sure what kind of impact that'd have on it's recording . . .
Jeff Reuben - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
I guess laundered money would have been for a different crime. I kinda liked the innuendos. Very clever idea, and nice choice of OS.
Invisible Boy - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
I liked the overall write and the "laundry" jokes. It was a perfect association to connect Heidi Fleiss, The Hollywood Madame, with Dirty Laundry.
Red Ant - August 31, 2008 - Report this comment
Belated thanks and an extra long spin cycle to MrMac, Aggy, Jason, Matt, Gianni, Max, Guy, Tim, TCOP, Peter, Peregrin, Phil, Dave, Jeff and IB.

Peregrin: It's a real situation: Heidi Fleiss runs a laundromat now.

Peter: Thanks. Not only are the choruses numerous, but they are in odd places, which really craps up the humor angle. At 6+ minutes run time, I figured shaving off unessential lines was the right choice, though it didn't pan out that way. I don't fault anyone for bringing it up though, because I would probably have done the same (and often have in my time here).

Dave: If I can find a backing track for this, I think I can cut it to my parody's length and record it.
Peregrin - September 01, 2008 - Report this comment
LOL! Still dealing with pieces of fluff!
Agrimorfee - April 13, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC) A semi-oldie, moldie as that nasty pair of undies at the bottom of the bin...but I digress. Still got power.
Matthias - April 13, 2010 - Report this comment
You already know how I feel about this one. I thought it was stupid for you to cut out the "Kick 'em when their up" line as well as hypocritical of what you preach since you complain constantly that things like Mad TV and Bob Rivers don't parody the entire song when they record. Not a favorite of mine by you at all Ant.
Mark Scotti - April 14, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great "spin'!!!
tomario - April 16, 2010 - Report this comment
looks like youve cleaned up with this one! how hard was it to find a rhyme for "sock?" lol 555
Andria - April 17, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC C & D) Well-done, Ant, and the very true subject of a brothel madam opening a cleaning shop, along with your typical quality, pacing, rhyming and humor, along with being a Don Henley fan, were what made this parody outstanding. 5s.

Tomario: I can think of a number of rhymes for "sock". Knock, dock, mock, Spock, rock, hock, hawk and a naughty word that also means "male bird" come to mind easily.
Christie Marie M - April 17, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC C/D) Great satire coming out of the rinse cycle! "Watch those suds build up, wait till they rinse down!" Since you left out spoofing that part, I took the liberty of ad-libbing that part of your song. But I've really enjoyed this parody, Red Ant. Doing 555 loads of your dirty laundry and it will come out clean...with Calgon.
UnKNOWNLaundress - April 18, 2010 - Report this comment
I can't say why I did not see this before now, L'ANT Rouge, but as I've mentioned before: . . . Oh, the feeling of freedom to just ' toss one's underClothes ' to the wind . . .
DJ Blaze - May 02, 2010 - Report this comment
"I never was a bleach blonde, now there's bleach by my side" was my fave line. Good one. 555
bobpiecheese - May 03, 2010 - Report this comment
(ABC-CD) See above.
Below Average Dave - May 03, 2010 - Report this comment
I will just stick with see above Ant, I'd have to see this one recorded, I thought it was funny hearing you sing parts of it on the phone--I just really want to see this recorded to get a full feel for how this would sound.
Abbott Skelding - May 03, 2010 - Report this comment
ABC: Never heard the original song, but still a great idea!

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