Jump onto a plane and I scour the whole planet
Finding talent takes one to scan it
The N.B.A. needs stars to give it life
Went in the jungle, where natives were huntin'
There by a tree I looked up and saw somethin'
And right there he was, a man of nine foot five

This dude's nine foot five--Gotta get this guy a contract
My head's at his thigh, I'm the agent you should contact
Sport of basketball, height will make you quite a cash pot
It's a gimmick but the fans will pay a whole lot

Nine foot five, no language were we saying
Held up U.S. cash, just to show what we'd be paying
Called the embassy, got him passports for his short wife
Got on the plane, and headed for the sport life

We got hoop dreams and some boards to shatter
This is one dude that won't need a ladder
My guy's head and shoulders above the fray
Find him a team and a well paid staff
Maybe hire folks that lost their giraffe
We'll put him out there, maybe find out if he can play

This dude's nine foot five--Gotta get this guy a contract
My head's at his thigh, I'm the agent you should contact
Sport of basketball, height will make you quite a cash pot
It's a gimmick but the fans will pay a whole lot

Nine foot five, if you got it you can flaunt it
There's a better life, and yes, size does matter don't it?
It's a rich man's game, if you want go all season
It's because they pay these dudes beyond all reason