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Song Parodies -> "Stay Alert"

Original Song Title:

"Be Our Guest"

Original Performer:

Disney Songs

Parody Song Title:

"Stay Alert"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Never say never.. never say "this is the last time I'm writing a parody to this song, I've done it too many times already"
People of the United Kingdom
This is an official government's announcement
on what to do regarding the current Covid-19 pandemic:

Stay alert
Stay alert
Or you'll end up in the dirt
It's the government's advice, cherie
To make sure you're not hurt
Wear a mask
On your face
Stay inside, stay in your place
For the government require us
To not spread coronavirus
You might die,
Worse, of course:
You'll use NHS resource
And who wants a ventilator to insert
So as has been discussed
Remember that you must
Stay alert
Yes, alert
Stay alert

It's up to you
So they say
If you want to stay OK
So, it's tough: we've done enough
Says the guff-ernment today
You're at home
Feeling scared?
Don't be caught out unprepared
No one has immune resistance
If you go out, keep your distance
Stay two me-
Tres apart
It's transmitted when you fart
So don't stick your face right up that miniskirt
Not hard to understand
Now wash your sodding hands
And stay alert
Do not flirt
Even if you're a pervert
Stay alert
Stay alert
Stay alert

Life, it makes me weary
Reading conspiracy theory
It's 5G, or the Chinese who caused it all
Snake-oil salesmen claiming take hydroxy-
Chloroquine and poof! the virus gone
Maybe your infection
Could be cured by bleach injection
Ultra-violet lamps, inserted up the arse
Who's that we hear speaking from the White House?
Flabby, fat and lazy
And quite frankly batshit crazy

Be alert
Be alert
Time 'n' again they reassert
Treasure trove of Raab and Gove
Also that whiny Hancock squirt
Boris? why's he not with them?
I thought he was the PM
Maybe he's now got dementia
Then convicted in absentia
Face it, there's
No excuse
Once more missing PMQ's
Guess he's scared that some more rubbish he will blurt
We'd like the truth for once
From that annoying.. dunce
Not "Be alert"
Be alert
Be alert
Be alert

Stay alert
Stay alert
Don't go to that pop concert
It may distress you, that's unless you
Are a real introvert
Mental health?
We don't care
Uh uh, do not go out there
No the government won't lurve you
Disobeying
Breaking curfew
Don't relax
One by one
'Til you're all out in the sun
If you catch it, it'll be your just dessert
So stay inside for aeons
With your PPE on
Stay alert
Stay alert
Stay alert
Please, stay alert

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arch Vile - May 22, 2020 - Report this comment
I wonder if that British bloke who wrote "17 million F**k offs" regarding Brexit is looking for a follow-up song?
CML - May 22, 2020 - Report this comment
Is this one of the Big 7, Phil?
Phil Alexander - May 22, 2020 - Report this comment
Yes, according to http://www.inthe00s.com/archive/parodies/smf/1200319774.shtml:
American Pie
Be Our Guest
Blinded By The Light
The Wreck of The Edmund Fitzgerald
I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General
Bohemian Rhapsody
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
..for some reason I find some of those extremely seductive to parody (though Blinded by the Light is just plain hard)
K1chyd Goes To Hollywood - May 23, 2020 - Report this comment
Relax - Don't do it!
Or you're gonna get Covid
Alert - Live through it
Home you wanna come

Unlike your choice here there's really not much to work with on "Relax" so I'm posting what little I came up with as response to your great parody.

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