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Song Parodies -> "The Breast That You Can't Chew"

Original Song Title:

"The Best That You Can Do ('Arthur's Theme')"

Original Performer:

Christopher Cross

Parody Song Title:

"The Breast That You Can't Chew"

Parody Written by:

Lee O. Jay

The Lyrics

Ah, to be child again... With props to Arwen for this twisted idea...
Once you start life (vagina),
Someone will nurse you, hard and round, and
When the milk flows, it's flowing out of her mounds
When both her teats she gives you --
Heavin' up her chest of twenty-four pounds,
You're won-der-ing to yourself,
"Hey, tonnage abounds!"

When you get plucked from momma's womb to two warm titties
(A hungry baby suckles two)
You have to 'suck' when you consume from full-formed titties
They're breasts that you can't 'chew',
They're breasts that you can't 'chew',
But full enough

Suckle before you start teething
Bottles aren't like the 'natural choice', where
Feeding your hunger's just it's just a joy!
Dribbling your food and taking your time, you're
Growing as well (a really good sign!)
Having no doubts about the way you should pee

When you get plucked from momma's womb to two warm titties
(A hungry baby suckles two)
You have to 'suck' when you consume from full-formed titties
They're breasts that you can't 'chew',
They're breasts that you can't 'chew',
But full enough

You're out of luck when you consume from 'too-small' titties
(You're hungry, baby, as a rule)
Cause you can't 'suck' if you consume from 'too-small' titties
The breasts that you can't chew,
The breasts that you can't chew
Are smallish lumps

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   7
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User Comments

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Johnny D - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
This is freakin' nuts. 555.
alvin rhodes - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
i enjoyed chewing on this one...tasty...5s
John Barry - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
You are the new Dr. Spock. Mamnificent!
Arwen - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
FABulous, Leo...=) "The breast that you can't chew" is an ingenius line!! Bastard.
AFW - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody was not a bust...it was one of the breast...
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - March 29, 2005 - Report this comment
In South Park they have 'Raisins' ('Hooters' with 9-year old waitresses.) Gobbled up this parody, Leo. Er, Lee.

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