Speedos that I wore that day seemed rather slack
Needed something in there, make up for my lack

I'm so self-indulg-ent I need a bulge to stuff the breach
Just long enough to grab attention at the beach
Try a hot dog, Speedos got a funny log, tootsie roll
I say, "should look good if I wet it"
One good cuke oughta fit it
Good lookin' rod!

Speedos! Whoa ho-ho-ho!
Here's for the honeys, here's for the show
Speedos are baitin' for a pretty ho
Speedos! Whoa ho-ho-ho!
I say, "should look real if I wet it"
Don't want her to regret it
Good looking fraud!

Speedos be sunnin', foolin' everyone, till I hit the surf
Then I lost my prop in water, and I got blue like Smurf
I be makin' for the shoreline, headin' for the vendor line, buyin' a coke
Sayin' " this beverage oughta do it"
My joint, ain't nothin' to it
Another big fraud

Speedos! Whoa ho-ho-ho!
Here's for the honeys, here's for the show
Speedos are baitin' for a pretty ho
Speedos! Whoa ho-ho-ho!
"Should look real if I wet it"
Don't want her to upset it
Next to my bod!