Tommy likes a salad for lunch
His fridge is nearly bare
he's down on his luck
it's tough
....SO tough

Gina hasn't been to the store
she's watching TV
she knows she hasn't pleased
her love
...HER love

Says she'll make a sa-lad.....with what she's got
doesn't make a difference what is in it, or not
we've got cucumber, and quite a lot
of stuff....
we'll - give - it - a - shot


"NO!" (cried Tom)......"we're SO not there
WE!....NEED!....an avocado pear
believe me girl....we need it I swear
SLI - CES!......of avocado pear"

Tommy gets his back right up
he's puffing out his chest
to make him look, oh, so tough
.....SO tough

Gina thinks of running away
She says the salad's fine
Tommy whispers babe "it's not okay!
NOT....
okay!"

"I know it's got let-tuce, and cheese, and stuff
it doesn't even matter if there's more than enough
a salad's not a salad if vari-et-y aint there....
it's - SO - not - fair!"

"WE'RE!......not halfway there
WE!...NEED!....an avocado pear
all you do.....is lie there and stare
WITH....OUT!....an avocado pear"

AVO-CADO PEAR!!!!!!!!!!

(wild guitars)

"We BOTH do...
our share of tasks!
I just want my salad, it's
---[key change]----
NOT....MUCH....TO.....ASK!

WE'RE!.......so not there
WE!....NEED!....an avocado pear
believe me girl.... we need it I swear
SOFT!....FLESH!....of avocado pear"

WE'RE!.......not halfway there
WE!....NEED!.... an avocado pear
all you do..... is lie there and stare
WITH....OUT!..... an avocado pear"

(more fleshing out of the chorus, then fade)