For The Longest Time

Woh, oh, oh, oh,
For the longest time
Woh, oh, oh
For the longest

I took you to dinner Wednesday night
Your cell phone rang in between each bite
What else could I do?
I sat there glaring at you,
But you kept yakking for the longest time!

I once thought that cell phones were the bomb
Now I hate them like Bush hates Saddam!
I just deplore them,
And at baseball games I throw them,
My team's been losing for the longest time!

I suppose they've saved a few lives
Ordered ahead
For pizza pies;
But when you start talking too long
I want to grab that phone
And just pound it to mincemeat!

Here's a choice that you have got to make--
I don't know how much more I can take--
At my insistence
You give up your free long distance
Or I'm going to leave you for the longest time!

Woh, oh, oh, oh,
For the longest time
Woh, oh, oh
For the longest

Then last week when "Idol" was on
You dialed all night
(I could be wrong....)
At the movies if I see it's on
I'll take it to the john
And I'll see how it flushes

Please don't think that I oppose free speech
But it spoiled our picnic on the beach
You videophoned me
Pictures of our sliced baloney
I've got to tell you it's "So long" this time!

Woh, oh, oh, oh,
For the longest time
Woh, oh, oh
For the longest time