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Song Parodies -> "Upwind Girl ~ ( The 'Stay The Heck Away From Her' Song )"

Original Song Title:

"Uptown Girl"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"Upwind Girl ~ ( The 'Stay The Heck Away From Her' Song )"

Parody Written by:

TJC

The Lyrics


Theese parody ees très magnireek !

~ ~ ~ ~ MATCHING MIDI ~ ~ ~ ~
~

[Chorus of Nasal n' Adenoidal Muses]
OH-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh--OH-OUR-NO-SES!

[Hapless Male Co-worker]
UPWIND GIRL!
Scents you wear--all redolent of hurl!
There's no aroma that you haven't tried
Today your featured fust is 'Suicide™'
--whole office cried...

'Cause of UPWIND GIRL!
Favors fragrances from Stills By Earl®
That offal essence you call Minx Musk Tripe™'
Has got me searchin' for yer tail n' stripe
--it's űber-ripe...

[Nasal Bridge (heh!)]
In el-eVAtors
Floors LAter
We're DY-y-ing
Today she's AIRing
Meth-HERring™,
We're FLY-y-ing!

[Hapless]
My nose is *not* that tough
Raid-spray huffs
Mimic SNUF-fles of
UPWIND GIRL
Everywhere she walks she wafts RankSwirl™
Has got no use for French colloqui-als
And so her 'toilete' water's straight from bowls
--of 'trotting' trolls

[Chorus]
[GRO-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-OSS!
OH-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh--OH-OUR-NO-SE!]

[Upwind Girl, solo]
DOWNWIND CHURL!
Today I'm demoing Le Fetid Pearl™
And lookin' hot but want you guys to chi-ill
And so I'll do a daub of DudeMood-Kill™
--by Necrophil™

[Upwind's Bridge]
And while I'm REEking
You're BEAking's main-li-i-ine!
Which turns your FREAking
Nose LEAkings blood wi-i-ine!

[Hapless]
I wish I could not smell
Her-fumed hell--
Fainting's swell near my
UPWIND GIRL
Think I'll mutate in her tox-ic world
Saw Michael Jackson take just one inha-ale
And now he's nose-less, pedophilic-pale,
--and pseudo-male

[Inspiring Geek Chorus]
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh 'EAU DE OH NO' !
OH-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh--OH-OUR-NO-SE!]


[Hapless]
UPWIND GIRL!
She's my Upwind Gir-r-r-r-rl !

[Upwind]
Always check weather vanes
'Round this Upwind Gir-rl !
I'll make ya hur-r-r-r-rl !

[Hapless (fading...)]
Wanna up-chuck my brains
'Round that Upwind Gir-rl
Why Upwind Gir-r-r-r-rl ?

[Upwind]
Better learn breath refrain
'Round this Upwind Gir-rl

[Hapless (softly, with last gasp)]
My Upwind Gir-r-r-r-rl !
You'd a' thought they'd arraign...
and so-
up - yours - gir-rl...

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 5   11
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User Comments

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alvin - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
lol...i smell a winner
Matthias - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Doesn't smell very pretty but was very pretty hilarious!
Andy Primus - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
She may be a stinker but your parody is not
John Barry - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
I breezed through this and laughed my nose off.
AFW - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
It's an ill wind that blows no good...but this wind blows very good...great lines
MadameDeTail - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Pirate Jack, you best watch your own "Tail of Woe" sir Sweaty; and stop watching my " Tail of WOW ' .
Upchuck Merle (haggard from allergic reaction to artificial aromas) - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks for "scenting-up" those who show no common scents. I read "snuf-fles" as "snuf-files" because "snuff" is what I'd like to do to some of these self-scentered types who have no scents of respect for others. Elevators - yuk! .... The irony: there is nothing so attractive as the natural pheromones of a healthy, hygienic, organic woman -- otherwise, there'd be no human race today. I hurl these Fives at you for your great scents of humor!
TJC - May 21, 2009 - Report this comment
Aromatical, potpourri-y n' odourisey thanks to all (even the incense'd ones)!
alvin, Matthias, Andy, John & AFW: Nice eau-de-pun runs, and thanks!
Madame... me thinks you have me confused with the true 'Sir Sweaty' as you refer to him, JAB, but thanks anyway!
Merle da' Pearl:::: Huge fun pun run, son! And I grok your meaning... can't stand the cologne OD syndrome so prevalent nowadays... whatevah happend to soap n' water?
Leo Keough - May 22, 2009 - Report this comment
I sat next to that girl on a plane one time and she was so good-looking that everyone on the plane kept staring at me, figuring such a reek couldn't possibly be coming from the girl. Needless to say, it was a long flight...Excellent parody!!!...555!!!
TJC - May 22, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Leo...sounds like olfactory fodder for another parody! The reek of the Edwina first classer? (naaaaaah!)
PMS - May 23, 2009 - Report this comment
Wafting three 5s your way
Agrimorfee - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
One never nose, do one? Great job...get a lawyer to officially Tm those TMs. :) 555

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