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Song Parodies -> "It's the Colossal Dinner"

Original Song Title:

"We Didn't Start the Fire"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"It's the Colossal Dinner"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I've been wanting to redo this song ever since the reaction to my first take on it. People were impressed with my knowledge of x-men, but not much beyond that. So here, enjoy your meal, if you can survive it.
Caesar stressing feta cheese, red dressing, collard greens
Nacho luncheon, bloomin’ onion, really sloppy joe

Finger-lickin’ shrimp in batter, spinach dip ‘n sample platters
Beans and rice-y, plain or spicy, stuff in potatoes

Onion rings, french fries, sugar things, potted pies
Choco in foil coined, meats with sweet and sour joined

Minestrone, split pea, Pepperoni, baked brie
Dip in oil, wrap in foil, never spoil pork loins

It’s the colossal dinner
You need all your forces
Over forty courses
It’s the colossal dinner
You completely eat it
Or you are defeated

Polish sausage, flavored out, spicy mustard, sauerkraut
Mozzarella, pizzatellas, giant cheese blocks

Roast lamb, roasted ham, gravy gravy, steamed yams
Fried rice, baked twice, beef n’ chicken stock

Knockwurst, bratwurst, stuffing stuffed in mushrooms first
Searing brisket, sirloin meat, flavored parsley, let’s go eat

Brewed beer, slightly chilled, bison burger, fresh grilled
Corny sheaf, smokin’ beef, Barbeque or mesquite

It’s the colossal dinner
You need all your forces
Over forty courses
It’s the colossal dinner
Gonna have to take it
If we fry or bake it

Broccoli, lightly spiced, spinach grimace, onions diced
spud stick, open wide, can’t beet it juicy dyed

Lemon glaze, on the grill, guided by utensils
Red peppers, slowly fried, blue cheese better on the side
Veggie burger, tofu, corn-furter, is for you
Fruit in loops, mango, green stuff in a taco

Slow heat garlic cloves, rye and wheat in bread loaves
Double decker nachos, smothered in some Bosco

It’s the colossal dinner
You need all your forces
Over forty courses
It’s the colossal dinner
If too weak to start out
You can eat your heart out

Apple pie, mint chip, pretzels hide in Lindt dip
Crumb cake, milkshake, buttered muffin slow-baked

Truffles in a creamy spread, huddled raisins in the bread
Rock’ road, hot fudge, a la mode, brownie sludged

Cyclone, Toblerone, Death by choc-o-late trombone
Sweet pate, crème brulee, what else do I have to say

It’s the colossal dinner
You need all your forces
Over forty courses
It’s the colossal dinner
It will break your diet
But you have to try it

Buttered rolls, veggie sacks, cupboards holding spicy racks
Shot pots, got lots, dippin’ dots, hot knots
Juicing, using clementines, crowding on the brunch line
Dinner puts you in the mood, eating this amazing food

Parmigiana pasta fried, carbonara on the side
Don’t be late, clean your plate, MUNCH MUNCH, ain’t it great?

Raiding all the kitchen stores, listen how my stomach roars
That’s what I am eating for, I can’t take it anymore

It’s the colossal dinner
You need all your forces
Over forty courses
It’s the colossal dinner
‘Till the food is gone
You must still eat on, and on, and on, and on…
copyright 2009+ Glen Stollberger

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   15

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Timmy1000 - January 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Any food left unwritten? This is colossal -555. I'd say more but a commode is calling.
Leo Keough - January 06, 2009 - Report this comment
555 - Definitely food for thought - If Elvis is still alive, he should hire you as his chef.
Christie Marie M - January 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Any parodies relating to food really catches my fancy! After singing your song, it makes me want to open a restaurant. Better yet, maybe you should open a restaurant! It's quite a feast! Great job 2nz! Here's a colossal dinner of 5 appetizers, 5, main courses, and 5 desserts!
alvin - January 06, 2009 - Report this comment
mammoth job....made my tongue water as well as tying it in knots trying to sing along
Ann Hammond - January 06, 2009 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - January 08, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages) Wowsers, this was delicious. Listmaking for this OS is often thought of as taking the easy way out (I have done it myself), but what made this really cool was how you managed to keep the original rhymes through most of the verses and changed each chorus. (Nitpick: "Roast/roasted" in the same line, and "gravy gravy" could easily have been "lumpy gravy".)
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - January 10, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages) Truly epic effort. Rhyme scheme pwnage (though the cherry on the top would have been matching OS rhymes every time... just getting pedantic now) Awesome job, thoroughly enjoyable.
Matthias - January 10, 2009 - Report this comment
A pretty great grocery list of food here 2nz! All in all impressive (Pretty much anybody who can pull this song off is impressive, because it's actually hard to come up with a long list of things, while still making it funny). Bang up job here my friend!
tomario - January 10, 2009 - Report this comment
i have never heard so many food stuffs in one song. pretty amazing parody. 555
bobpiecheese - January 19, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages2) What really makes this parody great is that this isn't just a random list of foodstuffs - it's an invitation/challenge to THE LARGEST DINNER IN THE WORLD. Pacing was spot on as well. 555!
Below Average Dave - January 21, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages) Congrats on making the foods fit the original rhyme scheme, as Agri said this is often done as a list because not making it a list is difficult. (I know, when I wrote my parody of this (which is the only non-list version I've seen) it was a really tall order) I applaud the completion, and even though I am not a fan of most list parodies, I make the rare exception now and then, and this one qualifies based on the theme for the round.
Arwen - January 21, 2009 - Report this comment stomach kills just from reading this...but probably not as much as your brain kills from writing it. GREAT job, 2nzy.
Melanie Lee - January 25, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages) Sorry, I wasn't as impressed as the others. Yes, you put a LOT of work into it, but it doesn't "build"; it's a laundry--er, lunchroom list. I did like the line " huddled raisins in the bread". 5-3-4.
Invisible Boy - January 25, 2009 - Report this comment
I thought this was a a great effort 2nz. I'm not as bothered by the "list parody" thing as some are. After all, isn't the OS a list ?
I liked "stuffing stuffed in mushrooms first" for the wordplay. I guess it's just a matter of taste...err trust...err crust...
Jeff Reuben - January 25, 2009 - Report this comment
(Ages) Wow, some tough song choices this round! So I agree with both sides here. You hit the pacing great and it was fun to sing along with. I would have liked to seen some funnier lines within the "list" part though. Still a fun read.
Silver Power - February 10, 2009 - Report this comment
[SOTM] Just incase your parody is accepted, I 'll comment it. I echo Tomario, that's a lot of foods. 545.
Claude Prez - February 13, 2009 - Report this comment
I've read and voted on this one before but didn't comment. Colossal, indeed! More clever and impressive than hilarious but still a very fun read.
Agrimorfee - February 13, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Back for a 2nd helping.
Arwen - February 27, 2009 - Report this comment
SOTM...lotsa food...lotsa smiles...=) Nice work here.
bobpiecheese - February 27, 2009 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above! 555 again because it's so awesome!
Max Power - February 27, 2009 - Report this comment
Below Average Dave - February 28, 2009 - Report this comment
See Above, still respect the fact you took it on. . .

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