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Song Parodies -> "I Hate Krispy Kremes"

Original Song Title:

"I Go To Extremes"

Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"I Hate Krispy Kremes"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

“Babe, they’ll have poker
And they’ll have pool!
This New Year’s party is always so cool!”
So screams my boyfriend
We’re in a fight
I feel like he has been begging all night

I’ve told him eight times, it isn’t my thing
Even if they’re watching Lord of the Rings
The menu gives me a fright!

Told him, “I won’t go, ‘cause I hate Krispy Kremes!”
And that’s the main dish; ‘cause ‘Deep Fried’ is the theme
Though I would LOVE a cheese ball
They won’t serve crackers at all
And so I won’t go, ‘cause I hate Krispy Kremes!

They’ve got fried chicken
Fried pickles, too
They fry things of which I haven’t a clue
Deep fried bananas
Legs of a frog
Double deep frying to cook a corndog!

Tell me how much does he plan to throw back
Before he welcomes his first heart attack?
I won’t pay his E.R. bill!

I said, “I won’t go, ‘cause I hate Krispy Kremes!”
Those deep fried Mars Bars aren’t AS good as they’d seem
After they BAKE cookie dough
They fry to cook it some mo’
And I just can’t go, ‘cause I hate Krispy Kremes!

No one makes bean dip
No veggie trays
Raw foods to them are a crime
“Here, try this fried calamari, it’s really sublime!”
Last year I laid awake half of the night
Pants set to burst at the seams
I won’t repeat
That dreadful plight
Caused by eating Krispy Kremes!


Said, “That’s the WAY it’ll be
If you go, go without me
But then you should know, it’s me OR Krispy Kremes!

“Because I won’t go, when I hate Krispy Kremes
I prefer blood flow
Through art’ries that are clean
You can be SURE I’ll be gone
If you pig out there too long
Baby, if you go, your new ho’s Krispy Kremes!”

I just won’t fry...I just won’t fry...
I just won’t fry...I just won’t fry...

(fade to end)

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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alvin - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
i can find no holes in this parody
2Eagle - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
Good one. I can't see the big deal about Krispy Cremes. Doughnut Prince in Burbank is the best.
TJC - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
A funny concept n' write that will *never* be picked up by the Simpsons!
LittleCupCakes - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
I agree; I prefer cupcakes . . .
bobpiecheese - December 26, 2008 - Report this comment
But Krispy Kremes are awesome. How dare you deride them! BLASPHEMY! Ahem. Bloody brilliant, Arwen. 555
Jeff Reuben - December 28, 2008 - Report this comment
Dunkin Donuts kicks Krispy Kremes butt! I immediately thought this would be Joan Jett's "I Love Rock And Roll" (ignoring the original song listed, and ignoring the current contest). I guess I just glazed over that part. Well done :)
Andria - December 29, 2008 - Report this comment
There is a doughnut shop that is better than either Dunkin Donuts or Krispy Kreme. It's called Cal's Doughnuts, and it's located in Eugene, Oregon. Whenever I'm in the area, I buy three dozen and freeze most of them because they're that good. 5s.
Arwen - January 19, 2009 - Report this comment
MOTHER TRUCKER!!! I just typed out long and witty comments and thanks for everyone...and then freaking lost them. I don't know how. But I DO know that I'm too lazy to re-type them 4:57. Ugh. Maybe later. I'm depressed now...I need a doughnut.

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