Song Parodies -> I'm Pinned Beneath My Things
| Original Song Title: | "The Wind Beneath My Wings" |
| Original Performer: | Bette Midler |
| Parody Song Title: | "I'm Pinned Beneath My Things" |
| Parody Written by: | Rick Cormier |
Maybe there is something to minimalist philosophy.....
Ohhhh, oh, oh, oh, ohhh
It surely is cramped here in my closet
I reach for a bag on the top shelf
Stand on a crate of flimsy pine, it gives way
Try as I might, can't catch myself
I grabbed for the shelf, what was I thinking?
It broke in half, weak from years of strain
I fell to the floor. I wrenched my back, I can't move
Then everything, down on me, did rain
I wish I had thrown away that anvil
And all these things I will never need
Bowling balls, weights and vises tumbled
And now I am pinned beneath my things
I don't know how long I was unconscious
But, when I awake, the nightmare starts
A pack rat, now trapped beneath a mound
Of useless items
Seems to be nothing I can do
I don't think I've ever used those ski poles
That engine block's from my sixty-three
Try to move, my attempts are feeble
For now I am pinned beneath my things
Why did I build full-sized model zeroes?
Keep all these things, all these things I will never need?
Oh, and why, why did I buy someone's stuffed beagle?
For now I am pinned beneath my things
Yes, now I am pinned beneath my things
Oh, I'm pinned beneath my things
Screwed, screwed, screwed
Oh I am pinned beneath my things
Why, why, why I say?
Is this how I will die?
I'm screwed, can't move, I'm pinned beneath my things
I'm screwed, can't move, I'm pinned beneath my things
Why, why, why on earth did I
Keep all this junk, now piled so high
Can't move, can't move
Oh, God, can't move
I'm pinned beneath my things
It surely is cramped here in my closet
I reach for a bag on the top shelf
Stand on a crate of flimsy pine, it gives way
Try as I might, can't catch myself
I grabbed for the shelf, what was I thinking?
It broke in half, weak from years of strain
I fell to the floor. I wrenched my back, I can't move
Then everything, down on me, did rain
I wish I had thrown away that anvil
And all these things I will never need
Bowling balls, weights and vises tumbled
And now I am pinned beneath my things
I don't know how long I was unconscious
But, when I awake, the nightmare starts
A pack rat, now trapped beneath a mound
Of useless items
Seems to be nothing I can do
I don't think I've ever used those ski poles
That engine block's from my sixty-three
Try to move, my attempts are feeble
For now I am pinned beneath my things
Why did I build full-sized model zeroes?
Keep all these things, all these things I will never need?
Oh, and why, why did I buy someone's stuffed beagle?
For now I am pinned beneath my things
Yes, now I am pinned beneath my things
Oh, I'm pinned beneath my things
Screwed, screwed, screwed
Oh I am pinned beneath my things
Why, why, why I say?
Is this how I will die?
I'm screwed, can't move, I'm pinned beneath my things
I'm screwed, can't move, I'm pinned beneath my things
Why, why, why on earth did I
Keep all this junk, now piled so high
Can't move, can't move
Oh, God, can't move
I'm pinned beneath my things
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User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
A very funny and fantastic job, here... has a good moral..and I'm also a pack rat, who can relate
I knew from the start that I was going to love this, as I am the world's WORST pack rat, and knew I would relate...but when I read "I wish I had thrown away that anvil," I seriously LOST it...
EXCELLENT job...perfect!
EXCELLENT job...perfect!
i can sure relate to this one...funny concept..5s
Like Arwen, "anvil" started me off, and the crazier the scenario got, the more I loved it. Bravo! 555
Rick C...I don't remember ever having you over to my place...but it sure sounds like it...lol...I'm gonna give you three 5's here...IF I can FIND them...shoot...I KNOW they're around here SOMEPLACE...what the h*ll did I DO with them???...~ ~ ~
hehehe!! This is just too good! 555
This would make a hilarious video. Great job here Rick.
we are of like mind, Rick
see my www.amiright.com/parody/60s/thebeatles935.shtml
...although I disagree, you should NEVER throw away anvils, ski-poles and engine blocks - brilliantly funny (undiscardable) STUFF! - 555
see my www.amiright.com/parody/60s/thebeatles935.shtml
...although I disagree, you should NEVER throw away anvils, ski-poles and engine blocks - brilliantly funny (undiscardable) STUFF! - 555
Thanks AFW, Arwen, Alvin, Kristof, Paul, Carol, Red Ant and Stu. Yeah, it's tough for me to throw stuff away too.
keep room in your closet for this one 5-5-5
Thanks, Malcom :-)
Another great one, keep doing what you're doing.
Thanks Lois.
Once upon a time, anvils were used for something practical. I think. Nowadays they're only for dropping on road runners and, more importantly, THIS. More excellent stuff, Rick. I'm officially a fan. And a suckup.
Thanks, Spaff. :-)
good job......get back to work!
Waiting for the recording with all the sound effects too, like a bowling ball, anvil, airplane, locomotive, avalanche, yelling, sobbing, whimpering, etc. 5's
Pure parody genius Rick. Would make a great recording AND video. Great visuals come to mind here.
OMG THAT WAS GR8 AHHAHAHAHA F****** HILARIOUS!
Great.
I have to ask who keeps an engine block in their closet, but even though i can't remember the OS it's very good.
(SOTM) I seriously can't believe that I missed this hysterical parody. Yea, Rick,I'd like to hear a recording too. I'm somewhat in the process of removing objects from my closets...a bigger task than I thought. 5's
(SOTM) That's some pretty heavy stuff, there. 555
Thank you Ken, Tim (not sure I'll record this one but, I liked your sound effects suggestions), Dee, Mikey, Teddy Bear, wannabemustangjockey (nobody keeps an engine block in their closet but, exaggeration is common in comedy), Adagio (yeah, they sure can get full over the years, can't they?) and Agrimorfee.
Still a fan. Still a suckup. Here's an idea for the recording: Get an anal-retentive collaborator who will toss it back and forth with you for months, begging you to pile on the sound effects. And who will then, once it's done, say, OK, now remove 'em all. Then, after all that, get, like, six people to listen to it. That would be cool.
HA! LOL, Spaff
(SOTM) Can't really express how much I love this, Rickster...BRA-freakin-VO!!!
(SOTM) see above - loved the subs for the title, Rick - I want to see the sequel to this, to see how you managed to extricate yourself, and btw how much do you want for that stuffed beagle?
SOTM - If you're to take Stuart up on his advice and write a sequel, remember to handle the coming-out-of-the-closet angle with extreme carefulness so to avoid any misunderstandings.
SOTM - Er... It would seem that I am the only one here that has not heard the original so.... DKTOS
(SOTM) Still excellent, imagine trying to sing with an engine block on top of you (among other things; the stuffed beagle was priceless).
(SOTM) I know enough of the OS to appreciate your rhyme choices. Hilarious theme, it reminded me of Principal Skinner's ordeal. Witty from start to end. 555
(SOTM) Many hilarious lines, very enjoyable parody.
Thanks again, Kristof, Stuart ($5 oughtta do it), Peter (I will be careful, LOL!), YWN? Thanks, Red Ant, Luke and Larry. Glad y'all enjoyed it.
(SOTM) "Use caution when opening the overhead compartments, as your karmic baggage may have shifted during life".
Thanks, John LOL! :-)
Yeah, what everyone else said-- lost it at the anvil and it got even better. "Ski poles" and "feeble" are great subs for the original ("hero" and "eagle", I think). Awesome.
SOTM...go figure that I was attacked by my closet earlier this evening as I was searching for my favorite jean capri pants. I haven't found them yet...but I do know where my long lost moon boots are. Still love this, Rick! =)
(SOTM) Still waiting for the recording...
Thank you, Mr. Prez, Ms. Evenstar and Mr. Mayfield. Arwen, I'm sure those moon boots are Supa-cute! Tim, still not sure I'm ever gonna record this one. If I ever do, I think I'd do it as a country-western ballad though.
I wasn't sure I'd like this, but now I'm sure. Hilarious idea, well-executed and to a song that deserved it. Great work here.
(SOTM) Excellent!! I can only too well relate.
Thank you 2nz and MG :-)
This is hilarious! :-)
(2005 SOTY) This is still possibly the funniest and most image-conjuring parody you've done. I understand the difficulty in singing this OS; I don't think anyone will hold it against you if you don't sound anything like Bette Midler (they might if you did, lol).
(SOTY 05) You ARE the pin beneath MY things! (blabla...)
Very good title, very good substitutions, and very good parody.
Still a fan. Still a suckup. Still pinned beneath your talent. Still awaiting the recording, whether it's schlock-pop, country, rap, or anvil death metal.
Second Place
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