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Song Parodies -> "(I Can't Get No..) Hard Contractions"

Original Song Title:

"(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction"

Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"(I Can't Get No..) Hard Contractions"

Parody Written by:

Malcolm Higgins

The Lyrics

seeing as in oh, 20 days or so, I will join 500,000 others watching them, I may as well parody them
I can't get no hard contractions
I can't get no hard contractions
but I try, and I try and I try and I try
I can't get those I can't get those

wellI I'm layin on the bed,
and the doc has on the stethoscope
and he's tellin me more and more
gynelogical information
suppost to start this birth formation
I can't get those.. no no no
hey hey hey that's what I say

I can't get no hard contractions
I can't get no hard contractions
but I try, and I try and I try and I try
I can't get those I can't get those

well that monitor's my t.v.
and the camera's lookin up me,
try to see the new baby
but an external cam just can't cut the jam
cause it can'e see what's inside of me
I can't get no no no no
hey hey hey that's what I say

I can't get no hard contractions
I can't get no hard contractions
but I try, and I try and I try and I try
I can't get those I can't get those

well it all seems so banal
as that baby comes out the love canal
and the nurse says bush or we're here till maybe next week
oh wait that's an amnio streak
I can't get no no no no
hey hey hey that's what I say

I can't get no hard contractions
I can't get no hard contractions
but I try, and I try and I try and I try
I can't get those I can't get those

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 1
 
 3   0
 1
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 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   1
 1
 1
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - July 10, 2003 - Report this comment
there's something about this song that's fun to parody
Meriadoc - July 10, 2003 - Report this comment
bush? was that a Freudian slip, Malky? ;-)

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