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Song Parodies -> "Dihydrogen Monoxide"

Original Song Title:

"Nineteenth Nervous Breakdown"

Original Performer:

The Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Dihydrogen Monoxide"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

To anybody who isn't already aware of the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide ("the invisible killer") and the governmental conspiracy that refuses to ban this dangerous and deadly chemical - have a look at DHMO.org - the truth about DHMO.
Well, it's a chemic-
Al that's endemic,
It's present in the ground
But we're all strangers
To all the dangers
When there's so much around
Well it seems to me
That the powers that be
Have known all this for years
And though they've tried
They just can't hide
It's even in your tears

They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide

When inhalation
Causes inhumation
You often end up dead
And I don't mean to scare ya
But it's everywhere, yeah
Even in your head
The government neglecting DHMO is insane
'Cause it's THE major constituent part of acid rain

They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide

Oh, who's to blame? It's poured down the drain:
Industrial solvent used at work:
Just poured away makes matters worse for me

Pollutes the seas
And lakes and trees,
The reservoirs we drink
It's in the grass
It's a greenhouse gas
We're standing on the brink
This may astound you
But it's all around you
You better understand
And realize
We must organize
And get this substance banned

They cover up - but it's around
Here it comes - don't succumb, don't be numb - don't be dumb:
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide
Beware Dihydrogen Monoxide

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 25

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 4
 3
 
 2   1
 0
 1
 
 3   1
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 2
 2
 
 5   19
 19
 19
 

User Comments

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John Barry - December 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job, Phil Isn't this the stuff that I used to see signs for in every hardware-store window back in the 1980s?
Phil Alexander - December 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Hardware stores? Not that I'm aware of... but you can buy DHMO in pretty much every supermarket; restaurants serve it, too.
John Barry - December 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Phil, I'm thinking of DMSO (dimethyl sulfoxide), a toxic "liniment" that was everywhere a few years ago.
Stuart McArthur - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
nice wordplay, Phil, your trademark, and a difficult OS I would have thought - 555
Michael Pacholek - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Let's see... Dihydrogen... H2... Monoxide... O... that would make the chemical symbol for Dihydrogen Monoxide H2O... but that's water under the bridge now.
Phil Alexander - December 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Psst... Michael - don't tell everyone: the fun of a song like this is realizing that not everyone knows WTF you're on about ;-)
Stuart - I went though a lot of songs to find one that scanned for "Dihydrogen Monoxide" (including "YMCA" (DHMO) and "The dangers of DHMO" (A Few of my Favourite Things) - which would work pretty well, but I've already done that song too many times) which also included enough internal rhyming to make it fun - but once I'd got this OS, it nearly wrote itself from lines taken from the DHMO.org FAQ page.
Johnny D - January 04, 2005 - Report this comment
555. But doesn't DHMO stand for something else? Heh heh heh... ;-)
Phil Alexander - January 04, 2005 - Report this comment
er... what else, JD?
John Jenkins - January 04, 2005 - Report this comment
You took a challenging topic and made your point very cleverly. Well done, Phil.
Scathe - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(sotm) Very nice, the environment needs the attention.
Phil Alexander - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Seeing as the SOTM voting thread is now up, I thought I'd better point this out so as everyone's voting on a level playing field, so to speak: this is a spoof... although pretty much every word in the song is accurate, DHMO is not a danger to the environment (though some people in southern Asia might disagree with that statement at the moment)... as Guy pointed out in a slightly more subtle way: DHMO is water, plain and simple. Which is why I love the dhmo.org website - it's taking the piss out of all those environmental and food scare stories we so love to read in the papers.
Agrimorfee - January 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Quick, we gotta get Ralph Nader on this right away! :)
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) *inhales fresh outback air* Fine work, Phil.
Know 1 can hear you dream - January 16, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I'm not sure but I think that Johnny might refer to DHMO as in "a dickhead in my opinon" or something like that. But like I said, I'm not sure.
Spaff.com - January 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Two true anecdotes:
(1) Penn & Teller have a cable show called "Bullshit"; in one segment they went to an environmental rally and got a bunch of people to sign a petition to ban Dihydrogen Monoxide.
(2) A pipe broke in my basement recently, and it turned out that my pipes were literally filled with Dihydrogen Monoxide. The stuff got everywhere; I had to replace a bunch of carpet and furniture.

Anyhoo, fun stuff, Philbo. I like the acid rain line best. And great choice of original.
Claude Prez - January 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Clever stuff as always, Phil -- and thanks to both you and Michael for letting me in on the joke so I wouldn't look like a total douchebag agreeing with you in self-righteous outrage (I do that sometimes, really I do). Great stuff.
Paul Robinsn - January 24, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Phil, once more you have blinded me with science...where's that eye-wash? Oops, I poured some of that damned DMHO stuff in them instead...good thing I submitted those "5" scores first...
Chris Bodily TM - January 25, 2005 - Report this comment
I should have read this parody before I got a stomachache. I mixed some dihydrogen monoxide with milk and drank it and I have the worst tummy ache in a long time. I read about this stuff in the 11th grade, and thank you for reminding me of it! 5's to you, Phil.
Peregrin - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Ah Phil, ya big spoofster! (I made sure I didn't mis-spell that last word, hey?) You had me going! Funny. I had a whole lot of DHMO fall on my house today, if only I had known I should have been concerned!
Johnny D - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above.
Arwen - January 26, 2005 - Report this comment
SOTM--very clever, Phil!
Stuart McArthur - January 28, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) already commented - very clever Phil
John Jenkins - January 30, 2005 - Report this comment
I have to admit that I read and commented on this parody earlier without perceiving the hoax, so my hat is off to you, Phil. Great job!
2nz - January 30, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but I'll trust the word of the others so as not to pollute your score. Great rhyme scheme regardless, Phil. Give 'em the old 2-1 punch, hydrogen and oxide.
Tim Mayfield - January 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Educational.
Phil Alexander - January 31, 2005 - Report this comment
:-D Thanks, everybody
Spaff - maybe I should have included a bit on the deleterious effect of DHMO on furnishings...
martha - January 31, 2005 - Report this comment
this got me goin till I read the comments...ingenious!
Jeff Reuben - January 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Very well done!
Meriadoc - January 31, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Excellent Phil!
Kristof Robertson - February 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Excellent, Phil!!

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