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Song Parodies -> "Ferret in a Brothel"

Original Song Title:

"Message In A Bottle"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Police

Parody Song Title:

"Ferret in a Brothel"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Since seeing this image in the "Museam of Bad Art", I've had "Ferret in a Brothel" running round my head to this tune..
In a museum
There's bad art you can see
But sometimes not just bad
It's sickening to me
There's mustelids
I bet you can't guess where
Rescue them, they need to get away from there

Who'd pay for s.e.x. with a vole?
Who'd pay for s.e.x. with a mole?
What dope could be so unkind?
Who'd grope a weasel's behind?
I hope that I do not find
Ferret in a brothel, eww
Ferret in a brothel

Some people say "whatever floats your boat"
But who am I to be a marten-et?
Only hope I don't find a badger
Things are getting 'otter
Polecats in your bed, oh

Who'd pay for s.e.x. with a mink?
Who'd pay for s.e.x.? well a fink
What dope would go bump and grind
And grope a big wolver-ine?
I hope that I do not find
Ferret in a brothel, eww
Ferret in a brothel
Ferret in a brothel, eww
Ferret in a brothel

Woke this morning
Don't believe what I saw
Must be a million ferrets
Bonking on the floor
Seems their clients are not hu-man
Now call David Attenborough
Video's in the can

Who's filming s.e.x. with a mink?
Who's filming s.e.x. with a wink?
I hope it's all in focus
I hope they don't provoke us
Can't cope, they're wearing chokers
Ferret in a brothel, eww
Ferret in a brothel

Ferreting for S.E.X.
[repeat ad nauseam]

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   4
 4
 4
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   0
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 0
 
 4   2
 1
 1
 
 5   6
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 7
 

User Comments

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Callmelennie - November 25, 2015 - Report this comment
DACHS-hund! You dont have to raise that tail tonight. Walk the street for rawhide. You dont have to sell your body to old Spike
Matthias - November 25, 2015 - Report this comment
I thought that this was a parody of "Genie In A Bottle" at first but then I realized that it was The Police song.
Rob Arndt - November 25, 2015 - Report this comment
Despite looking cute on TV, ferrets are disgusting. I once had one smuggled in from Nevada and not only did it stink but ferrets back up into corners to poop piles like big dogs! I gave my Smokey to a friend who put in his garage for the night. Ate and ruined his pot plants! Like many Californians, he released it into the wild. Waste of maybe $150 back then. Resist the urge to buy one or a Chinchilla (another annoying pet). 555!
John Jenkins - November 25, 2015 - Report this comment
Very good marten-et/otter verse and parody.
Phil Alexander - November 26, 2015 - Report this comment
:-) Thanks all.

Matthias - the Police are more my era of music (and local.. one of 'em lived next to one of my schoolfriends, back in the day). I'd not even heard of "Genie in a Bottle"..
Rob Arndt - November 26, 2015 - Report this comment
I thought that too! "Genie in a Bottle" is by Christina Aguilera, 1999.

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