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Song Parodies -> "I Drank Six Stingers, Now My Head's In The Can"

Original Song Title:

"I'm Just A Singer (In A Rock & Roll Band)"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Moody Blues

Parody Song Title:

"I Drank Six Stingers, Now My Head's In The Can"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Actually, I wrote this one before the other Moody Blues piece I submitted for today...
[Instrumental intro]
[slow drums, gradually picking up and adding instruments - then bass riff...]
~ ~ ~ (Barfing/retching sounds during drum lead-in) ~ ~ ~

(At bass riff)
{Puke, a-puke, puke, I'm puking} {Puke and puke and puke, yeah, I'm puking...}
[repeat and continue to the bass notes up until just before the regular lyrics start]

I had just wandered in
this place after work
didn't know any people there
I sat down to drink
This guy was gabbing
he was really absurd
I thought he was a dope
but then he bought me a drink
And then he bought me some more drinks
I said, "Thank you, Dude"
all of a sudden
the whole room did spin
Then next thing
I'm in the restroom with
my head in the can

I kept on puking
Man, oh man, did I hurl
Yeah, I did not expect this
I can handle my drinks
barfed quite a while
yeah, all over the place
Just what stuff was I drinking?
It was too much for me

And as I knelt there on the floor
I'm soaked in my puke
the guy comes in to pee
I say, "Hey, dude
exactly
what was I drinking
that made me so puke bad?"

He said, "Well, let me think...
Man, you were drinking stingers
one after the other
you were pouring
them down
then you were talking to this cute chick
had your hand above her knee
and then you
barfed on her skirt
then in her purse..."
{Not a good move}
{BLLEEEAAAAHHH!!!!}

Then I got up and staggered
'round I did lurch
stumbling right into people
I could not keep my feet
I got all tangled up
then fell on my seat
chair I sat on was broken
on myself I then peed
And then the bartender said,
"Buddy, that's all for you"
And then you grimace and some more chunks you blow
then shortly
someone took pictures
of my head in the can

[During instrumental break]

{Most embarrassing; man, and here's how it happened}
{First, I barfed all on the floor}
{and then on the door}
{and then barfed some more}
{and then I fell when I tried to stand...}
{and...}
{Someone took pictures of my head in can!}

I said, "Well, I'll be damned
I just can't recall at all the last time
I got so drunk and puked over myself
and then I staggered to my feet
and then without missing a beat
Again, I...
puked on that chick...
on that same chick...
{Icky-Ick-Ick}
{Eeewww!}

Right then the bartender said
"Out of here, man"
So I flipped him the bird
and then went out to my van

Then puked my dinner up
all over my van

There was no way to make it
back to the can

Next I remember
I woke up in the slam

I drank six stingers
then threw up in my van

Someone's got pictures
of my head in the can

The next two months
it smelled like puke in my van...

[During instrumentals out to fade]

{Puke, puke, oh man, I sure puked, yeah, man}
{I puked all over my van}

{I drank six Stingers and puked over my van}

{The next two months it smelled like puke in my van}

{I'd say this evening did not work out as I planned}

~ ~ ~ [repeat favorite line(s) out to fade] ~ ~ ~

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   8
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
funny as hell....and a tough song
Paul Robinson - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, alvin...I laughed myself silly a few times when I was TRYING to record my vocal overlay...even on the "Final" version I screwed up a line...but it was when I was trying to improvise an "extra" line I had thought up in the instrumental section after the lyrics ended...so I just laughed and rambled on...
Rick C - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL FUNNY! I hope this isn't something you do on a daily basis. :-)
Adagio - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL....: D fun!! (except for the puke).
Paul Robinson - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Rick C - fortunuately, no...don't even drink anymore, actually. But I can remember a FEW, just a FEW, mind you - occasions where I was pretty close the condition of the poor fellow in this parody...my BEST episode involved and seemingly never-ending supply of "Mexican Coffee" drinks (Tequila/Kahlua/Coffee/Cream - maybe something else? not sure on that) that I acquired by winning a rather large consecutive string of Pinball games with some fellow...wager? A drink per game, of course...and they would have gotten cold if I hadn't downed them, right? I have no idea how I kept winning when the entire place was spinning around me...maybe he was as wasted(or more) as I was...or maybe he was just a total spaz at pinball...but the bottom line is that I did some serious chunk spewing within about 1/2 hour of when I staggered, weaved and stumbled out of that bar...fortunately for all concerned, including other citizens of the community, I lived right across the street from the bar, so I did not drive anywhere...not an experience I would wish to repeat...
Stuart McArthur - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
what! puked on the same girl twice - what did she do to offend the karma Gods? or did you eventually puke on all the girls? very funny story, Paul - would make a neat partner to Jeff Reuben's Bar Maid Fight - 555
Tommy Turtle - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
No wonder drinking is such a popular pastime... Six is obviously too many - how 'bout just "Five"?
Red Ant - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
I echo Alvin's comment and fortunately I haven't had this situtation happen in many years, though it has happened. Mexican Coffee is what you listed, although the cream is usually Bailey's or some cheap knock off (add Grand Marnier and Frangelico and you have Millionaire's Coffee, an apt name since a fifth of all the ingredients is quite expensive). Oh, back to my "experience" - nothing you make you sicker than drinking Rumplemintz 100 peppermint schnapps. It has so much sugar in it that it will crystalize around the cap, sometimes requiring pliers to get it off. If you've never had it, think candyn canes dissloved in grain alcohol. Anyways, I've puked up my fair share of things but the heaves from that stuff are beyond awful - I suppose Yagermeister may be worse but I never could get it past my nose - lol. Oh, nice parody too here. 5s.
Paul Robinson - March 28, 2006 - Report this comment
Pat - thanks! Stuart - well, you can't say my parody "character" didn't make an impression on her...Tommy T - yeah, nothin' more fun than getting rip roarin' sick to the point of uncontrollable vomiting and offending just about EVERYONE who is anywhere near you during that particular moment of divine time...Red, thanks for the note on the ingredients...I nNEVER-EVER had a "Mexican Coffee" again after that evening..."Peppermint Schnapps"...uhhh...now that you mention it, that was probably the "beverage of choice" for my SECOND most awful "sick to the point of vomiting and not just a little" experience. I went out drinking with this out-of-work Jazz musician (is that redundant?)...he was working at our Car Wash at the time...and he LOVED Peppermint Schnapps....actually, he LOVED really cheap Vodka, too....and really cheap GIN, as well...I guess that sort of fills in the picture a little bit more clearly....BTW - he was one of the first people, I believe to truly recognize what a marvelous, economical, environment boon PLASTIC container were for alcoholic beverages...no worry about the bottle breaking if you stumbled or fell with it in your hands...AND - the brands that started doing it first were REALLY CHEAP, CRAPPY booze, anyway....Anyway, old "Gary" was drinking that Pep.Schnapps like water....and I was clueless about what it would eventually do to me...so I followed suit for a spell....sure tasted sweet....yeah....sure made me sicker the sh*t lter on and all the next day....talk about a "raw" feeling in your stomach...Thanks!
Larry Hensley - March 28, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but 555 drinks
Paul Robinson - March 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Larry ~ ~ ~

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