asparagus woman...stays away from peas
asparagus woman...don't want lima beans
she keeps bringin' it from the store
i don't wanna see this stuff no more
i got more important things to chew
this daily grind, gettin' old, its true
now, woman...take my plate away
asparagus woman...take it off my tray

asparagus woman...get some corn for me
asparagus woman...even hominy
the green stalks, i've come to abhor
don't wanna taste their flavor no more
could be have some cottage fries ?
dark green things i now despise
now, woman...take this crap away
asparagus woman...i won't eat today

asparagus woman..i just can't stay
asparagus woman...rather eat some hay
i'll just throw it upon the floor
don't wanna feed my face no more
i would like some navy beans
i could dig some collard greens
feel my stomach start to rise
what she serves is no surprise
now, woman...can't you see i'm peeved
asparagus woman...i just can't believe

yo...gonna say my say...gonna have my say
no more...no more
gonna leave 'em, woman...gonna leave 'em, woman
want fries...want fries...want fries...want fries
they're no good to me...i'm fed up with you
gonna toss these things up to the sky
tell ya, i just wanna spew
you know i'm gonna heave...you know i'm gonna blow
you know i'm gonna heave...you know i'm gonna blow, woman
don't buy asparagus, woman
don't buy asparagus, chick
don't buy asparagus, broad