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Song Parodies -> "You're Taking Too Damn Long"

Original Song Title:

"You Can't Hold On Too Long"

Original Performer:

The Cars

Parody Song Title:

"You're Taking Too Damn Long"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I may be a teenage female, but I can poke fun at my own kind. This idea just seemed to come to me during cross country practice, and it's written through the point of view of a preteen boy with an older sister.
You're locked up in the bathroom
But I need to go
Your daily hygiene routine's
Incredibly slow
You're busy painting toenails
While I have to piss
Geriatric sloths
Can go faster than this

I'm hopping now on one foot
I feel I could burst
But you yell and you scream
that "I got here first"
If you take any longer
I'll break down the door
You've been doing this now
Since I became four

You're taking too damn long, so get out!
You're taking too damn long, so get out!
You're taking too damn long, so get out!

You're applying your mascara now
And glossing your lips
While I try to not pee my pants
I'm squeezing my hips
Why do you girls feel compelled
To go look like clowns?
If any boy saw you
He'd sure wear a frown

You're taking too damn long, so get out!
You're taking too damn long, so get out!
You're taking too damn long, so get out!
You're taking too damn long, so get out!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.7
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 2.7

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   1

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - August 28, 2005 - Report this comment
DKOS, but can tell this is well written, with humerous content and deserves acknowledgment and fives..
Cat - August 29, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks!!! This is only my second one, but it's the first one where I really wanted to be funny. I hope to write a lot more. But coule you please tell me what DKOS stands for?
Paul Robinson - August 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Cat - "DK(T)OS" stands for "Don't Know(The) Original Song"...meaning the commenter can't judge whether your pacing and emphasis fit the structure of that piece. Usually that indicates they are not voting, but sometimes folks make exceptions...
Paul Robinson - August 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Cat, since I DO happen to know (and actually have) this song I went back and dug it out and played it. You did a real nice job on the pace here. It's just about perfect, except that those final four lines get repeated again at the end. I gave you a "4-5-4" here, but I liked what you did quite a bit, especially for only your 2nd parody piece. Suggestion: On those repetitive chorus (or other very repetitive sections) parts try to find ways to vary them in your piece. In this particular OS my initial take is that it would be rather hard to do it much differently than you did...but I still would suggest at least playing around with some different combinations and seeing if you can find a way to fit some extra twist or some fun puns in to replace some, or maybe even all of them...Yeah, a lot of work...and probably too much to ask at this point if you have only done two. But it won't hurt to play around with the might come up empty...but you might also really put together something that really stands out and shines. If nothing else it will likely increase your linguistic agility...not a bad trade-off, actually...BTW - Since I'm making a detailed remark here I should point out that you did do a really fine job of the rhyming and matching the verse pacing and making it clever and funny. Hope to see more of your stuff around, maybe I'll even know the OS material...
Cat - September 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks for the suggestions, Paul. =)
SBD - June 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Agree with Paul here, it's not bad and kinda funny - so same vote, 4-5-4

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