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Song Parodies -> "The Poker"

Original Song Title:

"The Joker"

Original Performer:

Steve Miller

Parody Song Title:

"The Poker"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

A poll in the July 11, 2005 New York Daily News shows that 93 percent of readers do NOT consider the World Series of Poker a sporting event. You know, I like to play poker as much as the next guy, and I like it when TV shows have poker games. They're usually good episodes. But I gotta ask: If 93 percent of the people think poker is not a sport, then what the hell are the other 7 percent drinking?
Some people call me the ace cowboy.
Some call me the gangster of clubs.
Some people call me boring
'cause I don't play a sport that they love.

People keep talkin' about me, baby
say, "Why he on ESPN?"
Well, don't you worry
no, no, don't worry, baby
'cause there ain't no hockey
that's why I'm on again.

'Cause I'm a player, I'm a grinner
I'm a winner, and I'm a sinner
at Vegas and Mohegan Sun.
I play poker, I'm a smoker, I'm a stogie toker.
I'm on a million-dollar run.

Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!

(guitar break)

That's the cutest thing that I ever did see.
Your full house, I beat it with four little threes.
Love to take, love to take your money all the time.
Ooh-wee, baby, did I waste your time?

'Cause I'm a player, I'm a grinner
I'm a winner, and I'm a sinner
beneath Atlantic City's sun.
I play poker, I'm a smoker, I'm a stogie toker.
Gotta go home, "Tilt" is on.

(guitar break)

People keep talkin' about me, baby
say, "Why he on ESPN?"
Well, don't you worry
no, no, don't worry, mama
ain't no hockey, so I'm on again.

That's the cutest thing that I ever did see.
Your full house, I beat it with four little threes.
Love to take, love to take your money all the time.
Ooh-wee, baby, did I waste your time?
(fade out)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Fives of a kind! The first two lines are great.
AFW - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Great job on a topical theme...fives
Peter Andersson - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
93 percent, I'd say that's the figure we had here in Sweden last year, but apparently the media brainwash has been more succesfull here since then, check out my parody on the same subject today. 455 'cos I had sing along problems with the last verse, both times. :-)
alvin rhodes - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
nice job...gee, i thought this one was gonna be about sex...5s
MasonR - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Can you believe the Poker competition has made the FRONT PAGE of some newspapers? Gee...and I thought Chess was the only "sport" you didn't need a gym for!
Michael Pacholek - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, gentlemen. If you don't mind me calling you that. Peter: Maybe Swedish brains are harder to wash. Or maybe it's only Borg that so easily assimilate, not Bjorn... OK, that joke is now officially old. Alvin: What do I look like, Johnny D? Malcolm? The third Hobbit Wonder Twin? Please, I do not think about sex every minute of the day. Only one out of every four.
Michael Pacholek - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
681 to 677? My, my, I've got more songs than Guy. Is DiRito just finito, or will he come back and fly? That good old boy is drinking whiskey and rye, singing, "I'm a-gonna blow Mike sky-high!"
Johnny D - July 12, 2005 - Report this comment
What JB said. No stud jokes, Michael?
Michael Pacholek - July 13, 2005 - Report this comment
No, Johnny. I wouldn't want you to send the boys to work me over for muscling in on your territory.

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