Song Parodies -> Stuck To My Member With Glue
| Original Song Title: | "Stuck In The Middle With You" |
| Original Performer: | Stealer's Wheel |
| Parody Song Title: | "Stuck To My Member With Glue" |
| Parody Written by: | Charlie Decker |
Well I don't know who I should call tonight
I got to feelin', what mom says ain't right
I'm so scared, can't move my hand from down there
And my grandma's calling me from downstairs
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Yes I'm stuck to my member with glue
And I'm wonderin' what they'd say if they knew
Would they help me get through my own disgrace?
Or would they laugh, not hiding mirth from their face?
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Well it started with a Hustler
Now I've civilly unioned my hand
And my friends are all forgotten
Oh why the wrong tube did I
Squeeze...squeeze...
Indeed, I did the Mighty Wang Chung
Choked the sherrif, wait for the posse to come
It's not cool, yet I declared Civil War
I held the sausage hostage, buttered the corn
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Well it started with a Hustler
Now I've civilly unioned my hand
And my friends are all forgotten
Oh why the wrong tube did I
Squeeze...squeeze...
Well I'm stuck without a paddle tonight
I think a paddle wouldn't help (it might)
I'm too scared to call the doc, he would stare
It's not true, that in self-love all is fair
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Yes I'm stuck to my member with glue
Stuck to my member with glue
I got to feelin', what mom says ain't right
I'm so scared, can't move my hand from down there
And my grandma's calling me from downstairs
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Yes I'm stuck to my member with glue
And I'm wonderin' what they'd say if they knew
Would they help me get through my own disgrace?
Or would they laugh, not hiding mirth from their face?
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Well it started with a Hustler
Now I've civilly unioned my hand
And my friends are all forgotten
Oh why the wrong tube did I
Squeeze...squeeze...
Indeed, I did the Mighty Wang Chung
Choked the sherrif, wait for the posse to come
It's not cool, yet I declared Civil War
I held the sausage hostage, buttered the corn
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Well it started with a Hustler
Now I've civilly unioned my hand
And my friends are all forgotten
Oh why the wrong tube did I
Squeeze...squeeze...
Well I'm stuck without a paddle tonight
I think a paddle wouldn't help (it might)
I'm too scared to call the doc, he would stare
It's not true, that in self-love all is fair
Paste to the left of me, lotion to the right
Here I am, stuck to my member with glue
Yes I'm stuck to my member with glue
Stuck to my member with glue
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | |||||||||||||||||||||||
| 5 | 19 | 21 | 21 |
User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Alternate soundtrack for American Pie 2, huh? :-)
Not healthier than a tube sock. But funny. Because it didn't happen to me. Remember, it's only funny until someone gets hurt. Some would say, "Then it's hilarious."
Masturbating with glue is some sticky shit, apparently.
No, that's the intricate art of self-sodomy.
*awaits banishment*
Hilarious stuff, Charles.
*awaits banishment*
Hilarious stuff, Charles.
Ha! excellent, Charlie - my favourite one of yours so far - flawless pacing and very funny (I've been wanting to do this OS, but haven't come up with an idea as good as this) - 555
Sometimes, a scenario similar to this one comes up WITHOUT glue. Go figure... 5's
You truly are a troubled youth, Charlie...;-) 555
It's like they said in "West Side Story," Kristof, though under VERY different circumstances: "The trouble is he's growing!"... "The trouble is he's grown!"
painfully funny...5s
I hate it when that happens...
Fantastic, sir. 5's all round.
[SOTM] Loved it so much I read it twice! (no, seriously, I read it twice). Thanks a bunch for making chosing 5 songs even harder >: ( 555
[SOTM] Charlie: the only teenaged boy in America who has Hustlers whose pages are actually stuck together with glue. Very, very funny stuff. Well done.
(SOTM) Already commented. Many good lines in here but I think my favorite is "Held the sausage hostage". Very funny.
SOTM--there are just some images of you that I don't want to have in my head, Charlie...good thing this made me laugh!
(SOTM) Already voted and commented. Still kept me stuck to my chair while checking it out.
(SOTM) You took it back from Tarantino's "Reservoir Dogs" ear-slicing segment, but inserted a brand new ghastly image to think of! Thanks! :0 Sereiously, great parody.
Thanks a lot, everybody.
Was it as good for you as it was for me? (Yes, double reference!)
Was it as good for you as it was for me? (Yes, double reference!)
(SOTM) Delightfully absurd, very funny
that is actually a pretty cute song. funny title. nicely done.
(SOTM) Fantastic, Charlie. I have the very same subject matter in my own "AY YI YI YI"
(SOTM) DKTOS, but funny!
(sotm) already commented and brilliantly funny, Charlie - loved how you got "Squee-eeze" in there and also the line "It's not true, that in self-love all is fair" - very clever
(SOTM) Sorry I missed this when it posted. Some great lines here...555
A super glue story! About Charlie Decker's gnarly pecker! Many lines that stick! (But "civilly unioned my hand" has got to be my fave.) And the please/squeeze sub is paste-perfect.
(SOTM) YIKES ;-)
(SOTM) Fastenating subject matter. 5's
This one must have been hard to write... keeping the tears out of your eyes, for example :-) Still, at least it wasn't superglue...
(SOTM) I still can't read this without feeling a little uncomfortable. Great stuff!
SOTM.. When I first saw the title, I admit I thought of American Pie 2. Then after reading it, I thought of a friend of mine who had a similiar situation, only replace the glue with Rub A5-35 and well.. you get the idea. Well done, Charlie. 555
Heh heh, you were in trouble because you gave yourself a hand. That's a sticky situation, and funny too. Nice one.
Get a grip on yourself, man. Still chuckling...
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