Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "If The Moat's In The Way"

Original Song Title:

"If You Want Me To Stay"

Original Performer:

Sly Stone

Parody Song Title:

"If The Moat's In The Way"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

If the moat's in the way
You need surround to slay
They'll be a failure there unless you seige
Catapult must throw
And then walls go
A-nother manor we've took for our leige

We'll se-ver battlements
After we pitch our tents
We can't take them by force, but by guile
Duck the crossbow's aim
Evade the pitch all poured aflame
Destroy the peasants' toil and grain for some miles

When the keep we're within
I'm hopin when we win
To get the ransom of some really 'fat cows'
Sneak in the postern gate
And smite the sentinel's pate
That or the donjon, tunn'lin', undermine

Our fortress ingressin' a-spoil
"E-gress" drops burning oil
Adding excrement and midden bits, damn!
When the moat's spanned those missiles thicker flew
Timber door needs the battering ram

Knights fight good
I wish we could
Get this castle ever subdued now

Well, we've blocked the ways in
My hope they're soon starvin'
And steward is wishin' they'd yielded now

Mercen'ries good!
I wish we could
Get this castle ever subdued now

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.

Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   9

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - August 31, 2006 - Report this comment
You sent me to the dictionary with this one. Just call me Don Jon.
alvin rhodes - August 31, 2006 - Report this comment
medieval funk...ya gotta love it
Meriadoc - August 31, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks guys! This is my fave Sly song, and I've always wanted to parody it (hopefull before Alvin - ha ha), but took forever to come up with a good idea...
Stuart McArthur - August 31, 2006 - Report this comment
did adagio help you two with this, by any chance? - lol - 555
mandamoo - September 01, 2006 - Report this comment
A fortress of 5's !
wandlimb - February 01, 2007 - Report this comment
"Knights fight good I wish we could Get this castle ever subdued now" Excellent! (but you misspelled siege)

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 685