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Song Parodies -> "Shatner"

Original Song Title:

"Shattered"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Rolling Stones

Parody Song Title:

"Shatner"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

I thought I'd.......make a tribute........that was well............deserved. My ship....my crew...... KHHAAAANN!
Shatner, Shatner
Chekov, Sulu, Scott and Spock
Are still surviving on the block
Look at me! I'm much fatter
I'm Bill Shatner, Shatner

Friends so bitter sounding
My lover had a drowning
Conventions
People dressed with Vulcan ears
Directing Trek Five
The critics trashin' Shatner!

TJ Hooker, Priceline shill and Trek and Trek and Trek and Trek
Look at me! I'm much fatter!
I'm Bill Shatner, Shatner

All this tribble trouble, techno-babble, bitter squabble
'Bout who did what to who
I can't give it away that 7th sequel
My old suit's in tatters (Shatner, Shatner)
Kirk the jerk is all I hear
I was hungry for success, success, success, success
Now I'm fatter (Shatner) Way much fatter
I'm Shatner, Shatner

Ahhh Look at me! I'm much fatter
Broken fastners
Look at me! I'm Bill Shatner, yeah

Pride and paying three ex-wives
That why we work all our lives
Pride and taking crappy roles
Still I'm up there on the screen
Look at me! I'm much fatter, yeah
Weakened bladder, bring me a platter
Am I fatter? Uh-huh
Am I fatter? Uh-huh I'm Bill Shatner!

Don't you see my waistline's going out, out, out, out
To keep getting paid I must take crap crap crap crap jobs!
I got bad singing uptown
3rd Rock last year
What a mess! I'm old and fatter
I'm all Mad Hattered, mocked all over Hollywood

Uh-huh, this town's full of sleazy lawyers
Go ahead, write me a Tekwar, I'll take the credit
Puff-doobie, my fish is battered
My dinner comes around and makes me
Fatter, fatter, fatter, fatter, fatter, fatter
Pile it up, pile it up, I'll never splatter.
More to come.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2
 2
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Laurence Dunne - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Very good. I don't know why but WS needs to be parodied. He missed his calling, he is a much better comedian than sci-fi actor..
2nz - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job, I liked how you switched up chitter-chatter into more than one thing. One or two pacing mistakes, but not enough to merit any point reductions. 5's Rick.
Johnny "Bones" D - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Dammit Spock, today I'm a triple-5 voter, not a proctologist!
David Chrenko - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
LOL - Love your tribute to the Ted Baxter of deep space. 5-5-5
Spock - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody, although logical is quite irregular.
Adagio - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Good read, Rick! DKTOS

Laurence...to me, his funny is making lame jokes and they're so bad, that it's funny. :D

David, that's it...he is the Ted Baxter...lol
Meriadoc - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
This was hilarious!
Mari D - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Have y'all seen Shatner in interviews? Laurence is right. He's funny!
George Takei - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, definitely, let's see more Shatner parodies around here.
Tim Hall - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
That was excellent. BTW, do you have any of Rhino's Golden Throats collection? This collection features Shatner trying to sing Mr. Tamborine Man and Lucy In The Sky With DIamonds
Rick D - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Oh yeah. We've heard that. As well as Nimoy singing "Bilbo! Bilbo Baggins, the bravest little hobbit of them all..."
urdarlindead - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
brilliant !
Claude Prez - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Wasn't...planning! On commenting....tonight! But! This...was...outstanding! However....I just have to mention that one of my all-time favorite lost nuggets at this site is one similar to this by KowGirl; she only did like three songs but they're all quite good. Hers isn't *real* similar tho and since she's apparently long gone I can confidently say yours is way better (love Golden Throats too btw; I think my fave is Eddie Albert singing "Blowin' In The Wind").
Rick D - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
You're right ,Claude, dang! I intentionally DON'T research these before I write, because that's too depressing, knowing how many people have similar ideas. However, I should perhaps look up the ones I'm about to post. This one by Kowgirl was a little too close for comfort. This site is a bit like a tree. There is the living part of contributing and commenting writers, then there is this huge trunk of material from all the departed or disillusioned that have left their wood here for the ages. Then there's Johnnie, who's sportin' enough wood for all of us.
Johnny D - January 21, 2004 - Report this comment
You got that right, Highlander.
Patrick - January 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Best one I've read in quite a while. Outstanding, fun to read!
Guy - January 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Great job Rick.
Michael Pacholek - January 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick, I believe you're becoming more human every day.
Rick D - January 22, 2004 - Report this comment
I see no need to resort to insults.
Paul Robinson - January 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick D - I think you may have violated some sort of Prime Directive here but it was a great job. I'm beaming over my First Officer, Mr. Schmuck, Medical Officer, Keith Richard, the Chief Engineer, Scotty Rotten, and a few Really Hot Yeoman from "Trek Girls Gone Wild" with three "fives" and the sedative for "Quadrazine" from the "Time Portal" episode. Don't cause any trouble or the girls will have to restrain you by any means necessary so the antidote can be administered.
Chris - January 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Great song. I like Shatner but can't really disagree w/ anything in your song.
Billy Florio - January 25, 2004 - Report this comment
RIIIIIIICCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!
Q - January 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Amusing and impressive for a life-form such as yourself. Care to defect to The Continuum?
k.m. - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
omg this is soooo funny
andy morgan - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
LOL!
Peg - January 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Shatner's a clown, this is great.
Abra - January 24, 2009 - Report this comment
I really would love to download this so my husband can listen to it, can you make that happen?
Rocko - December 06, 2010 - Report this comment
How can I hear "Shatner" ? I love this parody. great job
Mick Montreal - December 07, 2010 - Report this comment
I got to meet and talk with William Shatner and he's quite a trip. He's done documentaries for the U.S. Armed Forces (and he ain't even American), of course there's T.J. Hooker with Heather Locklear ; ) and other things as well. He was born and raised in Montreal (I found that out when I visited that fine city). He's best known as Captain Kirk and your parody is excellent. Dammit Rick, you get alot of 5s!

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