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Song Parodies -> "The Infomercial Song"

Original Song Title:

"Bohemian Rhapsody"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"The Infomercial Song"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Just another one of those little ideas that just suddenly popped into my head one day. =) And with so many other people doing this OS, it's about time that I did it, too.
Is this a real deal?
Or does it lie to me?
Various knick-knacks
They all flash on my TV screen
Dial up the phone, two weeks, and it's shown to me...

But I am cautious
Don't buy just anything
Whether it's pasta pots, stereos,
Vacuums or cookie dough
Don't know where my cash goes
Think they might be scamming on me...poor me

Popeil, just hawked this thing
It looks like a plastic brick
But he says it does the trick
"Take it, strap it "round your waist
And watch your pounds all quickly melt away!"
Popeil, ew...
I don't need the Master Thigh
But you'll be back at five o'clock tomorrow
Blather on, blather on,
Do your tirades really matter?

Call now, your time runs out...
"Twill save you lots of dimes, only for a lim'ted time!
Look here, everybody, see what it does,
It will tighten your behind and trim your glutes!
Call now, ooh...(To our funds, your cash goes)
If you're number 5*
We'll throw in a life supply of meatballs!

I see a little sti-i-letto of a knife

Chops your food! Chops your food! And it's perfect for mangoes!

Seven hundred dollars, makes me wanna holler, eek!

It's on sa-ale! (It's on sa-ale!)
It's on sa-ale! (It's on sa-ale!)
It's on sa-ale! So get it, go!

Convinced me? Nooooo!
I'm not a sucker, you cannot dupe me!

We are not scammers, entrepreneurs are we!
We much charm you with our verbosity!

Here today, gone the next, so I must say no!

Ad filler?! No! Our products make us dough!
(Make us dough!) Ad filler?! We rake in all your dough!
(Rake your dough!) Ad filler?! This dude is kind of slow...
(Kind of slow!) Here's our status quo:
(Status quo!) We just, we just, we just want your dough! (Do-o-ough!)
Dough! Dough! Dough! Dough! Dough! Dough! Dough!

Oh my good lordy, my good lordy, will you dirty thieves just go?

Hey listen, bub...we will shovel in a gift for free! (for free, for freeeeeee!)

So you think you can rob me and give me this junk?
So you think you can foist on me things that go clunk?!
Oh, "twon't be! I have been there with Flowbee!
It ruined my life, my head is devoid of all ha-air!

If you do not stall now, you'll get one for free
Lifetime satisfaction
That's "cause it's As Seen On TV!

Down the tube, my cash goes...

*caller number 5, that is!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   16

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
I'll take two of's my $555
Johnny D - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Good, solid job on one of "The Big Three", Cat. I like it --- good job on the pacing --- only 1 spot where I'd quibble, but not enough to give you anything less than 555.
Cat - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
I just realized that there is a typo in this song..."much charm" is supposed to be "MUST charm," heh heh.
Paul Robinson - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Cat, you have a knack for drawing me into parodies of songs that I generally ignore...but it was worth it today - your parody is really fresh and, well, interesting to read through...your story-topic fits the OS pacing and tone perfectly. I know I gush here, but it blows my mind how quickly you've reached this stage. You've obviously got a fine ear for music and excellent instincts for matching OS to your parody topics. I don't know exactly how many parodies you've posted here so far, but I know that a very large percentage of them are done to very challenging OS songs. I salute with three 5's, young lady ~ ~ ~
Red Ant - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent work Cat. I hate informercials, but I must say Popeil's Showtime Rotisserie cooker is great, as well as the GF grill. Anyways, many clever subs throughout. This might have garnered more attention if the title has been something like "Informerical Rhapsody" (even though the song name isn't in the lyrics I find pacing/rhyming titles is still fairly important in those cases - just my observation).

I gave you 4s, but since I voted while this was still on the front page I upped the vote to 5s, for no additional charge! Wait, there's more! Order now and...

Stuart McArthur - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
"things that go clunk" - ha - this parody's not one of them - this is a thing that makes me go "aaaah" - very nicely done, Cat, with some great subs, "ad filler" "Convinced me No!" - 555
Cat - May 31, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone! =)
Jonathan - June 01, 2006 - Report this comment
this was a good parody especially "Hey listen bub" it was one of those "now why didn't I think of that" parody's heh heh 555
Queen Sluggy - June 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Infomercials are bull shit! Great parody!
Silver Power - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
555... I hate infomercials. Even the NAME is false advertising. They only keep repeating the same small chunk of info about the item over an over... Welp, I'm done.. Stop me now.
Agrimorfee - July 19, 2006 - Report this comment
(Queen contest) The best of our entrants. You win.
Michael McVey - July 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, between naming yourself after my favorite animal and writing a truly witty piece about scam artists, I have to say my cash register is coming up 5's. Whether or not you agree with my politics, you should go over and have a look at my non-Queen parodies. I'm sure there are some you'll like. -- MM
Red Ant - July 24, 2006 - Report this comment
(Queen Contest) See above! (that typo should have read "Infomercial")
Red Ant - December 16, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-I) I forgot all about the Queen contest... anyway, not much to add to what I already wrote, though I loved "We'll throw in a life supply of meatballs!" this time around as well.
Guy - December 20, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-I) Queen contest? I bet that contest just dragged on. Sorry I missed it. I have about a dozen BH parodies in my portfolio. I always read BH parodies and I must say you have gotten through all the tricky parts quite nicely. Well done Cat. I have a cat and I think something is wrong with it. I think it is in some kind of pain. Why so you ask? She keeps saying ME-OW, ME-OW. And I say "Oh where does it hurt honey". She just keeps saying ME-OW. Nice write. I got the guy at the store to remove 4 nineths of a can of nine lives cat food so I could give you 5's. meow.
Invisible Boy - December 22, 2007 - Report this comment
This was fantastic. It starts with a great idea. Then you take on a very difficult song and create a wonderful parody with a perfectly placed "bub"
Invisible Boy - December 22, 2007 - Report this comment
above is for ABC4-I...forgot to mention...I thought I was the only person in the world who remembered the "Flowbee".
bobpiecheese - December 23, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-I) I could've sworn I'd commented on this before. Still amazingly awesome!
Laurie Alexander - December 24, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4-I) Very well done!!!! I remember the flowbee. My cousin's husband uses/used one! Love the idea of a lifetime supply of meatballs. Very creative
stuart mcarthur - December 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) wow, it's even better on this second read - so many great solutions to the BoRap problems - one of the big tests is Beelzebub, and your "Hey listen, bub" was beautiful, plus the ones I mentioned above - great stuff Cat
Below Average Dave ( - December 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) I know I've seen this before. . .I know I have, there must be a misfit comments island out near the Island for Misfit Toys. . .good job Cat.
Agrimorfee - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC4) i forgot about this one, too! Nice to see the return. Satisfaction still guranteed, no return necessary!
Matthias - December 27, 2007 - Report this comment
I'm pretty sure this is my 1st time reading this parody, but since everybody else said they've seen it before than I probably have too. Anywho... This was a hilarious parody which scanned perfectly to the original song.

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