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Song Parodies -> "Darn!/ Eight A.M. And Too Late!"

Original Song Title:

"Time/Great Gig in the Sky"

Original Performer:

Pink Floyd

Parody Song Title:

"Darn!/ Eight A.M. And Too Late!"

Parody Written by:

Adagio

The Lyrics

MIDIS:http://home1.stofanet.dk/bersan/Pink_Floyd_Midi/index.htm Scroll down to Dark Side of The Moon Album to click on "Time" and "Great Gig in the Sky"(In the U.S. the day after Thankgiving is the traditional BIG DAY FOR SALES FOR CHRISTMAS. People start lining up at least at 3 a.m.)
~~TIME:~~

Picking all day the moments that make up my sale day.
No quitter, don't waste hours on that...turkey day.
Picking up ads about all those stores in my home town.
Basting and roasting that turkey early in the day.

Tired from cooking and then you dine,
Stayed at home to watch those games.
Fell asleep, darn. (lines are long)
But there's no time to kill today.
And then next day I find,
...Ten hours have got behind me.
No clock to tell me when to run,
.........I missed the op'ning fun.

And I run, and I run to catch up with that door, but it's shrinking.
Racing to catch it, but it's closed again.
I run the same way as my relatives do, but I'm older,
"Shorter of breath and one day closer to death."

Now the sales are getting shorter,
Even though they try to mime,
Same things just cannot be bought.
They use all kinds of scribbled signs,
Hatching schemes in desperation in a store-bought way.
Their time is gone.
But songs do hover.
It looks like I have missed the fray.

(short interlude)

Well, home again
I'd like a stash that they've scanned.
But I come home old and tired
See nought that I own beside the fire.
Far away the stores still yield,
The presents that I want as well.
"Let me in" I say, "Oh, please."
"To see and hear the magic Christmas bells."


~~GREAT GIG IN THE SKY:~~

(instrumental)

Muttering amidst the music:

"Lady, the sales are over and I can't open the door
for just one person. Now do you think that would be
fair? Just come back another time. Unfortunately, the
prices will be much, much higher, but you don't mind.
Merry Christmas to you."

(The lady in question spends over three minutes banging on the door and sliding down the glass in frustration, moaning, groaning and wailing loudly just to get at the size two dress in the window.)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   6
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - November 28, 2005 - Report this comment
funny concept...let's all give thanks for huge sales...
Adagio - November 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks alvin :)
Adagio - November 28, 2005 - Report this comment
I have provided midi's for those that DKTOS.
Red Ant - November 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I've never understood the day after Friday rush-I asked one of my co-workers about it and she said she was going at 5am just to window shop?! I've worked in retail before during this time and we've had to nearly throw people out of the store and also had those chronologically challenged ones beg for just a few minutes in the store (after we closed). Great work Pat.
carol - November 29, 2005 - Report this comment
I like it. Good job. 5's
stuart mcarthur - November 29, 2005 - Report this comment
the nicely-paced muttering at the end made me LOL, Pat - 555
Paul Robinson - November 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Didn't think I knew the OS, Pat...but when I read the opening lines of your piece I realized which P.Floyd song it was...(I never was all that familiar with their titles...except for the most often played/well-known ones). Anyway, great job and very timely....as I may have mentioned before, I don't do any Holiday Gift stuff....and don't expect or really want anyone to give me any...maybe once every decade or so I might feel the urge to buy someone something I know would please them....but I'd really rather write or do something for them instead...5's ~ ~ ~
Adagio - December 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Jack, carol, Stu and Paul!

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