Once I saw my dentist for a gnarly root canal,
The pain was piercing, language mighty foul.
Then approached this needle, that’s supposed to ease the pain,
It trickled down my throat, then froze my brain.

I am liking Novocain,
Needles pinching gums.
And I’m getting really numb
This awful flavor really grinds my gears
Then pain subsides and I express my garbled cheers.

I am just a patient, and you are DDS,
Suicide was just a fad I guess.
Before those pliers could pull my tooth
With Popeye forearms just like Babe Ruth
Extracting my crown, pulp and rotten root.

I am liking Novocain,
There’s blood in my eye.
And I sure can’t feel a thing
I’m drooling buckets down my brand new shirt,
But thanks to you I now can live without the hurt.

You are just a dentist, and I am just a nerd,
Insurance pays up cause you’re well Preferred.
Before your helper could rinse my mouth
She rubs against me, my eyes go south
Consolation from this once Girl Scout.

I am liking Novocain,
Can’t talk, laugh or smile.
And now, see me driving home
To come on down from this tooth-frozen state,
Maybe tomorrow I’ll eat food that’s on my plate.