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Song Parodies -> "Booger Fountain"

Original Song Title:

"Sugar Mountain"

Original Performer:

Neil Young

Parody Song Title:

"Booger Fountain"

Parody Written by:

Jim Rotondo

The Lyrics

Tribute to 2nd Grade Snot. (I taught Comp Ed to K-8 for 3 years. It was my job to also keep the keyboards and screen cleaned after their use....perhaps that experience inspired this parody).
Oh to drink from booger fountain
With that snotnose in my 2nd grade class.
You can’t drink plenty from booger fountain
Though your drinking leads to endless gastric gas.
Endless gastric gas.

It’s so runny in his nose
He’s got sniffles never blows.
And the bad cold that he had
And his ugly pants of plaid.

Oh to drink from booger fountain
Bigger nostrils than the colored baboons.
You can get sick from booger fountain
Though they say that drinking water’s good for you.
Water’s good for you.

Kid’s a connoisseur of snot
Pickin’ hundreds, quite a lot.
Sticks ‘em underneath his desk
Lots of greenery grotesque.

Oh to drink from booger fountain
Pinky product from the sticky lagoon.
You can’t flick goblets from booger fountain
Grungy globs belong in someone’s brass spittoon,
In someone’s brass spittoon.

So I booby-trapped his shoes
With some instant stick’em glues.
Now he walks around in socks
Like a-hole without a fox.

Oh to drink from booger fountain
Elementary school was my first platoon.
Low water pressure from booger fountain
Clogging pipes on mostly Thirstday afternoons
Thirstday afternoons.

Such a bully so uncool
Hope he’s kicked out of our school.
Otherwise I’ll skip the bus
And avoid this little cuss.

Oh to drink from booger fountain
With that snotnose in my 2nd grade class.
You can’t drink plenty from booger fountain
Though your drinking leads to endless gastric gas.
Endless gastric gas.


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   8
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 8
 

User Comments

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alvin - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
lol...digustingly descriptive
Christie Marie M - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
I have to go with Alvin on his last comment. It's very funny though. I remembered this situation like yesterday in school. Kids I went to grade school with always got yelled at for picking their nose eating goblets, which is very disgusting. I also had this boy in my class who had sinus problems and tried to gross us out with his mucus and the teacher told him not to make everybody nauseous. He also got in trouble for that in school as well. This song goes to show how gross some children can be. 555.
Mark Scotti - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
Hilarious, childish, and soooo made for parody! I'm still laughing... Keep the "Neil" coming, Jimbo!!
Invisible Boy - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
A fine bit of descriptive writing here, Jim. I'm green with envy...
Tim Hall - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
No need to dig for gold - this parody has it all!
Jim Rotondo - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
Thank you all VERY much, glad you could all relate to one of our common threads, snot. Is there an official word for snot? Gives new meaning to going green!
2Eagle - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
That's the way I want to mangle songs with the word "sugar" - so cloying. By the way, the proper word is "mucous" in case anyone cares, but I like "snot" better.
John Barry - May 07, 2009 - Report this comment
Grade: 5s
Andria - May 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Sorry if I gross anyone out here, but my schnoz has been a "booger fountain" for the last week or so thanks to a horrible head cold that I thought was swine flu. This parody was gross but 5-worthy, and I enjoyed it. And for 2Eagle: It's "mucus", not "mucous".
Jim Rotondo - May 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks 2Eagle, John, Andria, much appreciated. Geez, snot that gross, was it? Slim pickens.

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