Song Parodies -> "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad"

Original Song Title:

"Two Out of Three Ain't Bad"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Two Out of Three Ain't Bad"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

That gurgling sound you hear next will be Will and Pach having apoplexy. Now excuse me while I go get the pliers and pry my tongue out of my cheek...:-D

Maybe we can bomb all night
But that ain't getting us Hussein
We shot up everything in house in Mosul
There's nothing left alive in there

And maybe Saddam cried all night
But maybe this will change his jihading zeal
The rubble's really piling up outside
And maybe soon our troops can leave here

We shot within and they shot without
Rubbed out those brothers and we singed their hair
We cut their words and then of course no doubt
We sent them up to meet Allah
A hundred virgins are awaitin' upstairs
And all we can do is keep on shelling them

Got Uday (got Uday) got Qusay (got Qusay)
And there ain't no way we weren't gonna shoot them
We missed the dad (missed the dad but)
But two out of three ain't bad
We missed the dad
But two out of three ain't bad

You hafta be so bold with a loaded breech
You'll never drill for oil if there ain't no peace
It's just like looking for a needle in the hills of Iraq
But there's no more Hussein boys - bettin' now ol' Saddam is a-crapping his jocks

Did Bush lie?
Did Bush tell us that there's something there's not?
Those weapons are so sly - they're in the Euphrates
Don't drink the water
Glowing you'll be like a sun spot!

Well, there's only one chance we had to ever prove
And that was so many years ago
And though we know that Saddam ignited Gulf War I
We didn't bomb him flat; lay him low
Well I remember how we left him there to terrorize
Oh he pissed us off - made us real mad
Tho' lib'rals pleaded and they begged us not to start up this war
He'd thumbed his nose at ol' USA

So let's keep on shelling them
Let's keep on shooting them
Let's keep on seeking them
Got Uday (got Uday) got Qusay (got Qusay)
And there ain't no way we weren't gonna slay them
We missed the dad (miss the dad but)
But two out of three ain't bad

We shot them (we shot them) pumped lead in (pumped lead in)
And still the planes are flying high above you
We missed the dad (missed the dad but)
But two out of three ain't bad
It's too bad...
Got two out of three - now dad!

Maybe we can bomb all night
But that ain't getting us Hussein

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Pat - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment

Liked it.

Michael Pacholek - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment

Nice job. Especially since, after the first chorus, you admitted the war was about oil. Actually, I shouldn't say "was," since American soldiers are still dying. Being a liberal, I know damn well what the definition of the word "is" is.

Meriadoc - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment

The 'oil' line was the tongue in cheek part Michael ;-)

Robert J. Pagliaro - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment

Nice job - and, oh I almost forgot, he lied (and it's not about SEX).

Meriadoc - July 25, 2003 - Report this comment

Thank you Robert. (Um... do you think Bush has ever had sex? Other than twice I mean... ;-D )

Peregrin - July 26, 2003 - Report this comment

Mike, read the 'tongue in cheek' comment at the top. Yes, people are dying. And YES, it is a PARODY. The definition of parody is quite clear. Any parody I help to write is not done in mind of what the reader's political beliefs might be. Lighten, man ;-)

mandamoo - July 26, 2003 - Report this comment

Great parody once again. ; )

Michael Pacholek - July 28, 2003 - Report this comment

I'll lighten, Pip, right around noon on 1/20/05. Merry, I I think the Bush girls may be adopted... Then again, they do drink as much as their dear old dad... It's not like Steven Tyler and Joe Perry are using the name "Toxic Twins" anymore... And if Tricia Cox didn't look just like her Tricky father, poor girl... I gotta get my mind out of the gutter. I'm starting to think like Malcolm. Maybe you just have that effect on guys.

Claude Prez - July 29, 2003 - Report this comment

Great job. "Crapping his jocks" was the best.

Mikey F - August 03, 2003 - Report this comment

you own the cards? If so then its only 2 out of 4, but that still aint bad! Great song btw!

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