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Song Parodies -> "A Two And A Three Ain't Five"

Original Song Title:

"Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Meat Loaf

Parody Song Title:

"A Two And A Three Ain't Five"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Hard to believe I haven't done this song yet. Well, sometimes forcing a song doesn't work, as we imagine this young lady putting up a song that should've stayed an idea... not that it's anyone in particular... What can I say, true love and good parodies never run smooth.
Baby you can write a song
but that ain't getting us nowhere.
I've told you everything I possible can.
There's nothing funny anywhere.

Baby, you can type all night
but that'll never change the way the song feels.
The votes really piling up on the site.
I wish you hadn't posted that song here.

I scored it true and I scored it right.
I tried to show you scoring good and fair.
I'm tired of words, I need to say good night
and you've been writing bad so long
I'm crying acid rain instead of tears!

And all I can do is keep on telling you
It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.

You'll never find no gold from the girl named Royce.
You'll never get no fives from the Florio boys.
I know you're looking for a way to keep from going so wrong!
But there ain't no magic pill lying at the bottom of a Johnny D song!
(Not for that problem, anyway.)

I can't lie. I can't give you ratings you haven't earned!
No matter how you try
You'll never be able to write these ditties
ditties that just won't get you burned!

Well, there's only one girl that I will ever love
and that was so many songs ago.
And though I know I'll never get her out of my heart
she went to Michael Douglas, ooh, I know.

And I remember how she didn't like the songs I write.
She told me I should go back to bed.
And though I pleaded and I begged her, "Babe, I wanna get more"
she packed her phone and turned right away.

And she kept on telling me
she kept on telling me
she kept! on! telling me!

It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.

It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't...

Baby you can write a song
but that ain't getting us nowhere.
Give fives to a song that hasn't earned it? I would do anything for love, but I won't do that.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2
 2
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   11
 11
 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Barry - September 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Ah, but when the muse touches you.
Johnny D - September 23, 2004 - Report this comment
You earned it.
Phil Alexander - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
The "(Not for that problem, anyway.)" line made me grin; but the "It's funny / yes, honey / but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money" was sheer pathos - and something that has been said to me on more than one occasion
Arwen - September 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Don't lie, Michael...you'd give me fives no matter what...; )
MrMacphisto - September 25, 2004 - Report this comment
This one's like a bat out of hell... 5,5,5

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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