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Song Parodies -> "Element 82nd"

Original Song Title:

"Stairway to Heaven"

Original Performer:

Led Zeppelin

Parody Song Title:

"Element 82nd"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

Oh they’re shady for sure, out for makin’ the gold,
While applying El'ment 82nd
And it gets up your nose, found it stored in kids clothes,
Asian herd are the ones take the blame for?

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
Their applying el'ment 82nd.

Oh the great China wall, if you visit be sure,
‘Cause beware sometimes substance not what’s seeming,
Gettin’ fat these Chinese, get the lead out oh please
Mostly all what we bought shorts the livin’

Poison lead you may get, if you buy from the east,
You keep hear it on news in the evening.
We all think, jeez Louise as we’re smoked with PB’s,
It's their choices of what they are cooking.

And I’m thinking real soon, we’ll all see lead balloons,
Even diapers will have PB seasoned.
When PBs start to spawn your life won’t last long,
Won’t need war chest to get what they’re after.

We better hustle ‘fore our heads blow,
Sound the alarm now.
As they keep sprinkling us with "leadines".
Synaptic brain paths kiss them bye-bye,
Then make us all dumb,
They’re getting’ primed to change the road we’re on.

Now your head’s bumming and you don’t know what you should so,
Lead snipers’ mauling you; disjoint them.
They’re shady and their evil wind blows so you should know,
Take care, they tries to make us whimpering wimps.

And as we get a lethal load,
Those baddos set upon their goal.
Lead makes one crazy this is so,
They whines and fights on news talk shows,
While the Chinese rake in the gold.
But now please listen to this bard,
Hey Woon get lead on out your ass,
A Chinese fire drill befalls,
They push the "rock", that's how they roll.

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And we're buying el'ment 82nd

Oh they’re shady for sure, out for makin’ the gold,
While applying el'ment 82nd.
And it gets up your nose, found it stored in kids clothes,
Is the third herd the ones to take blame for?

Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And we're buying el'ment 82nd
Lead (PB) atomic number 82 on the periodic chart is not a user friendly element as this exerpt from a scientific data article attests to: What follows is a brief description of lead. Standard state: solid at 298 K ·Colour: bluish white Lead is a bluish-white lustrous metal. It is very soft, highly malleable, ductile, and a relatively poor conductor of electricity. It is very resistant to corrosion but tarnishes upon exposure to air. Lead pipes bearing the insignia of Roman emperors, used as drains from the baths, are still in service. Alloys include pewter and solder. Tetraethyl lead (PbEt4) is still used in some grades of petrol (gasoline) but is being phased out on environmental grounds. Exposure to lead above tolerable levels is known to cause the following medical anomalies: Learning problems, emotional disturbances, nervousness,anemia, anxiety, loss of appetite, headache,convulsions, hair loss, epilepsy

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Kristof Robertson - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
A frightening but genius write, Guy! And to pitch it to a Led Zep OS gets extra clever-clogs points from me. Great stuff. 555
McKludge - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
No Stairway! :-) 555
Ann Hammond - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
cool
alvin - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
solid lead !......makes more sense than the original lyrics to be sure
PMS - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
Lead me congratulate you on a great write
malcolm higgins - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
awesome Guy.. welcome back to the fold
Rick C - October 16, 2007 - Report this comment
Great write, Guy! Get the lead out. 555

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