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Song Parodies -> "Neopets Junkie"

Original Song Title:

"Junk Food Junkie"

Original Performer:

Larry Groce

Parody Song Title:

"Neopets Junkie"

Parody Written by:

Michael McVey

The Lyrics

Would you believe the word "password" is considered profanity by the Neopets KGB???
You know I love being on the Internet
I always want e-mail
And they call me Mr. Computer geek
Of my knowledge they always avail
I only visit good websites
I stay away from all the smut
And my friends are always begging me
To go out 'cause they think I'm nuts
Yes, they are....

Oh, but at night I turn the lights out
Lock the door and hide the key
And I close all the shades and windows
So nobody else can see
I click that mouse so slowly
Take a peek up and down the hall
Then I log on to Neopets
And I play it all night long!

Yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. Business
Just as staid as I can be
But at night I'm a Neopets junkie
Good lord have mercy on me!

Well, at lunchtime you can always find me
At the Internet cafe
Just checking out all my e-mail
To see what I got today
And I'm posting on the message boards
And I download a few good songs
I'm surfing the net in a careful way
I'm not doing anything wrong
Oh, no....

Ah, but when that clock strikes six-thirty
And I'm all by myself
I type in that, uh, entry code
And see one of my Neopets
Either a grundo or an aisha
then I sit back, trade and play games
To run up my neopoints total
And learn all my neopet's names!

Yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. Business
Just as staid as I can be
But at night I'm a Neopets junkie
Good lord have mercy on me!

My friends down at the computer store
They think I'm really neat
Oh, I don't know a thing about gigabytes
But I know which websites can't be beat
I'm a friend to the Snopes webmaster
And I only go to professional sites
I got most of Earl Nightengale's CD's
I listen to every night
Yes, I do....

Oh, folks but lately I've been spotted
Holding an acara plushie
Stumbling into a Wal-Mart
Chomping down an orange blue slushie
I'm afraid someday they'll find me
Just stretched out on my bed
With a handful of TCG collector cards
And a stuffed chia by my head!

Yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. Business
Just as staid as I can be
But at night I'm a Neopets junkie
Good lord have mercy on me!
2004 Michael W. McVey

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.8
How Funny: 3.2
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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Adagio - January 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Hehe, you too? Or is this just parody? What gets me is that Neopets never even gives us a hint as to what that so-called 'profanity' is in our message.
Guy - January 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent Michael. Did you know that Donna is really Adam in drag? Just watch that Neocam and look for the 'Adam's apple' on Donna when she pans across the camera view. Grundos are cool and so is your parody. I wrote one on this myself to 'American Pie'. Glad to see another one on this subject out here. Nice job!
Adagio - January 03, 2004 - Report this comment your Grundo immitation...cracks me up Maybe I can join the 'crowd' and make one on Neopets, too.
neminem - January 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah, I haven't been on very much in the past year. The year before that, though, I was on like every day.
wwe lover - August 09, 2006 - Report this comment
hey i love neopets!

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