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Song Parodies -> "The Brewer"

Original Song Title:

"The Gambler"

Original Performer:

Kenny Rogers

Parody Song Title:

"The Brewer"

Parody Written by:

Susanna Viljanen

The Lyrics

On a cold November evening
I washed my tank for brewing
I warmed up water and the wort
and added up the yeast
I closed the lid and waterlock
and waited for the bubbling
My Christmas batch is brewing -
it'll be ready for the feast

I learned this skill in teenage
when I was still in high school
I liked it and decided to head
to study chemistry
I studied many a year
from atoms to zymurgy
and bubbling of the ale batch
was my favourite melody

Now every chemist knows
the secret of the success -
is not amount of yeast
but keeping vessels clean
Now bubbling for two weeks
that is main fermentation
and then decant the brew
and let four weeks in storage be

You gotta add the yeast and water
you gotta add the wort and enzymes
you gotta keep the vessels clean -
decant when two weeks' gone
You never drink your beer
when you've done main fermentation
there'll be time enough to drink
when the storage's done

Now the ethanol is formed
along main fermentation
but it will taste so bad and foul
so incubate a while -
Two weeks of storage cool -
it will improve the flavour
the longer you do incubate
the better taste and style!

You gotta add the yeast and water
you gotta add the wort and enzymes
you gotta keep the vessels clean -
decant when two weeks' gone
You never drink your beer
when you've done main fermentation
there'll be time enough to drink
when the storage's done

You gotta add the yeast and water
you gotta add the wort and enzymes
you gotta keep the vessels clean -
decant when two weeks' gone
You never drink your beer
when you've done main fermentation
there'll be time enough to drink
when the storage's done

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   1
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 4   2
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User Comments

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Peter Andersson - November 24, 2016 - Report this comment
So you're one of the few Finns that don't prefer vodka? :-)
Susanna Viljanen - November 24, 2016 - Report this comment
Yup :-) I prefer ale. Not that I had distilled vodka myself, but a good tallboy of real ale is a pleasure on itself.
Bert - November 24, 2016 - Report this comment
She's a chemist and she's ok...
Jonathan - November 24, 2016 - Report this comment
^ I like Ale too! Ginger, that is! :) nice parody of a song by a legend who, is unfortunately, retiring after this year. Mr. Rogers (Kenny, that is!) stated that in addition to getting older, another reason for his retirement, is his frustrations with the current state of country music. I listen to people like Sam Hunt, Luke Bryan & Old Dominion, just to name a few, and can see where he's coming from! I'm only detracting a pacing point, because I believe a verse was missing! 455.
John Lomain - November 24, 2016 - Report this comment
New word of the day- zymurgy. Nice parody (hiccup)! 5's
Patrick - November 28, 2016 - Report this comment
Regional and local beers are coming back in style in the US. I think there are a dozen breweries in Kansas City. I was interested in chemistry at one time, but not for brewing.

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