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Song Parodies -> "Tighten the Wattle"

Original Song Title:

"Time in a Bottle"

Original Performer:

Jim Croce

Parody Song Title:

"Tighten the Wattle"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

To doc I say: “Tighten the wattle!
A little snip and stitch should do.
Just take it away,
Ply your flay and suture trade today—
Make my neck look brand-new.

Don’t stray with your blade when you sever;
Your surgeon skills now must accrue.
Just shave it away, gently sever and then
Tighten up the flaps that you hewed.

Just remember that you have a sharp knife
To do the things you’re trained to do. . .
Just remindin’!
I’m lookin’ down; I see the bloat
Of jowls and scowl. . .distended throat
I’m findin’.

You’ll cauterize and put in stitches;
I’ll seem to have regained my youth.
I’ve no Botox envy,
Just sagging-skin enmity,
So, doc, be sagacious and couth.

Just remember, please to have a sharp mind
And do the things you’re trained to do. . .
Have not mind dim
You put me out; Quasimodo
To my dreams comes; I wake to know
That I’m him.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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AFW - November 11, 2011 - Report this comment
Nobody likes a turkey neck..not even on Thanksgiving....unique subject

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