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Song Parodies -> "A Kick To Be Sick"

Original Song Title:

"Thick As A Brick"

Original Performer:

Jethro Tull

Parody Song Title:

"A Kick To Be Sick"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

This is based on the first 10 minutes and the last 5 minutes of this classic mega-song. The singer of the song is a grumpy, slightly senile old man in bed at a nursing home.
Do me a favor before you go out
Pull the curtains closed, Honey, tell the kids not to shout
Please forget all about my hair in the sink
And please give me a sponge bath, I'm starting to stink
My sore throat makes me talk like a seal
And my chicken soup starts to congeal
And the kids, they don't know how it feels
What a kick to be sick

Now the time-release capsules have been put away
But my skin still takes on a pallor of grey
Honey comes in and asks, "Are you OK?"
I feel just a bit better than I was yesterday
I lay back and think of Jennifer Beals
The used-car salesmen give me their spiels
And Judge Wapner don't know how it feels
What a kick to be sick

And the itch on my heel is so far away
I'm in such pain that I can't reach it today
Then I blow my nose (PPPPZZ!!)
It's clogged just the same

Let me tell you about years that were much more uncouth
Pour me six parts of sloe gin to one part vermouth
Sit back, and I promise I won't keep you very long

Look now! A baby's born, and he's got the croup all right
There is panic in the bedroom, let's call the MD tonight
We'll Vapo-Rub him, a vaporizer by his bed
Shove a thermometer up his butt, and place moist towels on his head
Antibodies fight the bug, but the audience is bored...

So come on all you doctors, with your high-tax bracket wages
With your appointment books, you lousy crooks
Why don't you cure the cold today?
You cannot fight Establishment, the AMA is Government
The secret is lemon juice, now isn't it?
What's with the world today?!

Now where the hell's my Skittles?
I need them now, not yesterday
And where is my breakfast, and my newspaper, too?
You don't care about me at all
Writing up your contracts to keep me locked up in the Shady Folks Rest Hall

So I sit back and watch all the game show deals
And I see my chicken soup still congeal
And none of you know how it feels
What a be sick
Copyright 1992, Agrimorfee Yeah, I kinda stole one line from Tom Lehrer.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Paul Robinson - December 31, 2003 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - I've been meaning to look at your stuff and know this original song. But it's a long one and today I've got to run, lot's of things to do, so I PROMISE to check you out while I'm up North next week kicking back. Take care.
2nz - January 11, 2004 - Report this comment
I love the kicked back optimism and it's downward spiral through the song.
Paul Robinson - January 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee, Just got to a place where I could get on-line a couple days ago. Finally got a chance to got thru this and it's strictly superb. 5-5-5. Had already written this one down to look at but 2nz's "Agrimorfee Appreciation Week" recommend reminded me about your other stuff. Keep up the good work.
Rick D - January 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul is right. It's a Tull order and you filled it.And even I wouldn't have caught the TL line if you hadn't mentioned it.
Phil Alexander - January 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Just seen this one from comments left: there's not enough Jethro Tull around... but I'm sure Tom Lehrer never mentioned sloe gin (though I did take the change to be sort of a homage rather than a plagiarism).
Meriadoc - April 02, 2004 - Report this comment
Ten minutes? The version I got hold of only reads 3:01! :-0
wdh - April 04, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm puking at this parody, but not because I don't like it ;-) Good Job
John Jenkins - April 04, 2004 - Report this comment
I agree that doing a parody of the entire original song would have been too taxing for you ... and the reader. The length of the parody was probably just right, and it also had good elements of rhyming and humor.
Johnny D - April 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Very clever, kind of Volpone-e-esque. Ben Jonson would have approved.
Guy - April 06, 2004 - Report this comment
Missed this one. Some clever wording in there. 5s for a difficult song to parody.
neminem - April 06, 2004 - Report this comment
"Yeah, I kinda stole one line from Tom Lehrer." - "Only be sure always to call it please 'research'" :-P. Anyway... this song is a bit disguisting, so how about I just give you a 5/5/5 already and get the heck out :-P.
Paul Robinson - April 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - Great job here, voted back in January. - April 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey Aggro - forgive me cuz my Jethro Tull familiarity is severely limited, and when you said that this parody covers only FIFTEEN MINUTES of the song, I threw in the towel. But I can still appreciate the rhythm, rhyme, and sentiment. My favorite line: "I lay back and think of Jennifer Beals." (I'm assuming that's not the one you borrowed from Tom Lehrer.)
Agrimorfee - April 08, 2004 - Report this comment
Spaff, you can get the gist of it from any well-stocked Jethro Tull "hits" compilation, they edit it into bite-sized morsels for the Prog-Rock-Intolerant. :) Original lyrics here:­ml
martha - April 09, 2004 - Report this comment
great parody soem really nice lines here
Claude Prez - April 09, 2004 - Report this comment
"Shove a thermometer up his butt, and place moist towels on his head"--Pure poetry right there buddy; probably appreciate it even more if I knew the original better though
Scathe - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-K) Nice write.
Johnny D - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above
Dee Range - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC. Only remember parts of the OS, but this is good. Matched what I remember very well. Liked the Skittles/ Biggles sub
Stuart McArthur - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(K) I reckon congealed chicken soup would be one of life's little miseries at that age too Agri - very perceptive - and I still have the OS album - and it just keeps getting better (unlike anything else by Jethro Tull) - 555
Jeff Reuben - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Well done!
Red Ant - August 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) DKTOS, just "kid"ding =). Anyways, I like this one. 555
Armstrong - August 15, 2005 - Report this comment
VERY poetic! good work

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