-> "Enterprise Superstars: This Wesley Must Die"
Original Song Title:
"This Jesus Must Die"
Parody Song Title:
"Enterprise Superstars: This Wesley Must Die"
The Lyrics
RIVAN
Good Leator, the Edos wait for you.
The Humanoids have no respect for you.
LEATOR
Yes, Miss Rivan, you know why we are here.
We've not much time, and a trespasser here
MOB (outside)
Trespasser! Humanoid!
Trespasser! Humanoid!
Trespasser! Humanoid!
Trespasser! Humanoid!
LEATOR
Listen to this stupid group, those blockheads of Starfleet!
A trick or two with spaceships, and our God is sure displeased!
ALL (inside)
They are dangerous!
MOB (outside)
Beverley! That's your boy?
ALL (inside)
They are dangerous!
MOB (outside)
Tell us, Wesley, who you think you are.
MEDIATOR ONE
They're on Rubicun right now to vex almighty God.
MEDIATOR TWO
They started out on Strnad's world, and now they want our sod.
ALL (inside)
They are dangerous!
MOB (outside)
Wes Crusher, trespasser!
ALL (inside)
They are dangerous!
MEDIATOR ONE
Look Leator, the boy has disappeared!
MEDIATOR TWO
Yes Leator, just what we might have feared!
RIVAN
Hey, wait!
The humanoids are running from their problems!
MEDIATOR ONE
What shall we do about this boy, Wesley Crusher?
Troublesome juvenile, pitful fool.
MEDIATOR TWO
The grownups, his army, are now fleeing justice.
LEATOR
One thing I'll say for him -- his captain's no fool.
RIVAN
We dare not leave them to stir up more trouble.
Their half-witted Starfleet is out of control.
EDOANS
But how can we stop them?
They warp out in seconds!
Ten light years a minute, they're out of our pull.
LEATOR
I see bad things arising.
They colonize Rubicun, our god gets annoyed.
I see Edo destruction,
Our elimination because of one boy.
Edo destruction because of one boy.
ALL (inside)
Because, because, because of one boy.
LEATOR
Our elimination because of one boy.
ALL (inside)
Because, because, because of one, 'cause of one, 'cause of one boy.
MEDIATOR TWO
What then to do about imperial Starfleet?
RIVAN
How can we deal with their technology?
EDOANS
Where do we start with a race that is bigger
Than Kirk was when Kirk did his space travel thing?
LEATOR
Fools, you have no perception!
The risks we are taking are frighteningly high!
We must crush them completely,
So like Kirk before him, this Wesley must die.
For the sake of our planet, this Wesley must die.
ALL (inside)
Must die, must die, this Wesley must die.
LEATOR
So like Kirk before him, this Wesley must die.
ALL (inside)
Must die, must die, this Wesley must, Wesley must, Wesley must die!
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
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Total Votes: | 2 |
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