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Song Parodies -> "W-S-O-P"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Harry Chapin

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Rex Ungericht

The Lyrics

This will date me, but I matched the pacing in this parody to the original 1973 45rpm single, which I still have in my collection.
Logging into the game
Trying my luck in another cheap online tournament
Hoping that I can play my way into the pinnacle event

Remember how I joined in every poker game
And I said 'That's the place for me'
And how I lost my job when I overslept from playing until three
I had two jacks and got another on the flop
So I pushed forward all my chips
But a heart came on the river card
And a lucky flush beat my trips

I wish that I was playing the WSOP
Watching as the cards are dealt to Phil and Chris and me
Wink at the audience that's watching on TV
Looking for another king, getting dealt a three

The thinking I do when I play a hand – it makes opponents sweat
They don't know if I am bluffing when I make a bet
So I wonder why I have never hit the big time and made it into the jet set
And I keep on winning local games and some on the Internet
But not the big one yet

I wish that I was playing the WSOP
Watching as the cards are dealt to Devilfish and me
I calculate the odds like I'm a PhD
Devastated when his hand gets the victory

I'm making extra money as a Wal*Mart greeter
Earning the tournament fee
And I'm always thinking 'bout my betting patterns
And working on my strategy
And there's a pot on the table right now,
Just waiting for a guy like me
And a television show that's gonna pay (me)
Dough I'm gonna spend like it was free

Sometimes I get this crazy dream
That I've won a fancy new car
And that I've travelled all around the world – a poker superstar
Getting my clothes straight from Armani,
I smoke Padron cigars
Everyone would point and say "hey, there goes the seven-card czar"

OK, reality
I know they're better than me
Even with a run of luck
The odds are against me, I'm just a poker schmuck


I wish that I was playing the WSOP
Watching as the cards are dealt to Doyle, Sam, and Deeb
I laugh at Howard's bluff, and raise a million three
Everybody's got a chance, even schmucks like me

I wish that I was playing the WSOP
The WSOP is the World Series of Poker. "Flop" and "river" are terms used in Texas Holdem poker. "Trips" is a poker term for three of a kind. The professional players mentioned are: Phil Ivey, Chris Ferguson, Dave "Devilfish" Ulliot, Doyle Brunson, Sam Farha, Freddy Deeb, and Howard Lederer.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

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alvin rhodes - April 19, 2006 - Report this comment
a clever write
AFW - April 19, 2006 - Report this comment
Very good deal, here...won't get lost in the shuffle...rake in a pot of fives
Dee Range - April 19, 2006 - Report this comment
555 Very Well Done.I admit I watch a lot of poker on ESPN, and have visions of winning the WSOP one day.
Tommy Turtle - April 19, 2006 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but KTP (know the players...) I played online in the play-money games and won pretty consistently, but what I read about the collusion, etc. in the big $ stuff scared me off. Check out Steve Badger's I've had some corresondence with Steve over play of hands, etc.; he shoots straight. Oh, and flop this set of Fives.
Michael Pacholek - April 19, 2006 - Report this comment
I don't know if you've got any wild cards, but this parody is W-I-L-D! As for your Harry Chapin record, I'm glad you've got one (HUGE Harry fan), but I hope you're not "feeling up your 45."
Larry Hensley - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
This royal flushed them away! 5's
Rex - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks all, and may the river always be the card you're looking for.
Doyle Brunson - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
If you're still drawing at the river, you're playing bad poker.
Red Ant - April 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Sorry I missed this yesterday Rex - I love watching the WSOP as well. I got a chuckle out of the above comment: going all in with a 10 deuce off-suit isn't exactly a sure way to win. I assume DB also meant "on a draw" instead of "drawing" when it comes to the river card. Three 5s.

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