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Song Parodies -> "The Wreck of the President Gerald"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"The Wreck of the President Gerald"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Gerald R. Ford was President of the United States when the ore freighter Edmund Fitzgerald sank in Lake Superior on November 10, 1975. Not that he could have done much about it, though he was in the Navy during World War II. Although this pokes some fun at him, he was the last Republican President I liked. Maybe the last I ever will. This is also my fourth "Wreck" parody, most of any song... one out of 100 of my songs are to the "Wreck." As story-songs go, it inspires more than most. Jerry was an All-American lineman at the University of Michigan (the Wolverines), but coached Yale's linemen in return for law school tuition rather than play for his home-State Detriot Lions. "CREEP" was actually CRP, the Committee to Re-Elect the President," Nixon's redoing/undoing. And Spiro Agnew was Nixon's first Vice President, who had to resign -- strangely, for crimes that had nothing to do with those under the umbrella term "Watergate."
The legend lives on from Grand Rapids on down
of the good man who ended our nightmare.
Dick Nixon, it's said, saw his chances go dead
and he boarded his last chopper flight there.

With a load of hard time, twenty-five years in line
the House of Representatives serving
the bald gentleman from the State Michigan
was now watching his career path curving.

The guy was the pride of the offensive side
of the line of the Wolverines' scrimmage.
At center he played and America prayed
in the White House he would do no damage.

He turned down draft picks and went in politics
and he did not try to be a hero.
He had to be Veep when the President's CREEP
got in trouble and so did old Spiro.

We got in a scrape but we had Nixon's tapes
for impeachment we all were soon pining.
On August the eight, Dick knew it was too late
and the time had come for his resigning.

We now know it's true, Tricky Dick never knew
"It's not only the crime, it's the cover."
We might not be cured, but Ford had reassured
"Our long national nightmare is over."

The Dick's legacy left a tattletale sound
and Ford knew he must issue a pardon.
That got people mad and next you know they had
around Jerry, they started to harden.

The Mayaguez caught, Ford sent men who had fought
a nice win for the Administration.
But for the first time, things got this out of line
mixing unemployment and inflation.

The Soviets talked and his own Party balked
thinking our country was in peril.
And on the plane's step there in Salzburg did trip
came the wreck of the President Gerald.

Does anyone know where the Soviets go
in the East Europeans' direction?
He talked in debate, and recanted too late
and the Jimmycrat won the election.

He might have won still but we all had our fill
of the White House's short-terming renter.
And all that remains is the faces and the names
at his First Lady's rehabbing center.

But now he can ski and go up to the tee
and give speeches he's always repeating.
But not President, he's got predicament
it's OK to say in golf he's cheating!

In a musty old hall in Grand Rapids they stroll
through a time of discussion and quarrel.
The church bell chimes 'til it rings 38 times
for the number of President Gerald.

The legend lives on from Grand Rapids on down
of the good man who ended our nightmare.
But at age 91, I hope he's having fun
and that he won't be tripping up right there.

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Pacing: 3.0
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Total Votes: 2

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User Comments

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Rod Worden - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Incredible, Michael! You should send a copy of this to Mr. Ford, I think he would enjoy it! "And on the plane's step...came the wreck of the Pres Gerald" lol! 5s!
Laurence Dunne - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
GF was another president who had a few great bloopers: President Carter speaks loudly and carries a fly spotter, a fly swasher -- it's been a long day." "If Lincoln was alive today, he'd roll over in his grave." "Things are more like they are now than they have ever been." "I love sports. Whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio." "There is no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe"
John Barry - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Brilliant, Michael.
Rod - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Laurence: Thanks for sharing! "..I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio" LOL!!!!
alvin rhodes - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
HAHAHAHA...good parody...i wish you were my history teacher
Tim Hall - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Will a parody of Suzi Quattro's Stumblin' In be next?
Michael Pacholek - July 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Sorry, Tim, each Prez gets only one, even nonconsecutive Grover Cleveland. Except Georgie Bush, of course.
Johnny D - July 14, 2004 - Report this comment
The legend lives on
From Lorne Michaels on down
Of the prat-falls Chev-y Chase had taken
Lampooning how Ford
Was so often self-floored
Was how Chevy Chase brought home the bacon.

555
Meriadoc - July 16, 2004 - Report this comment
One of your best in the 'presidents series' so far!
Michael Pacholek - December 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Former President Gerald Ford died last night at his home in Rancho Mirage, California, outside Palm Springs. He was 93, the longest-lived President ever. I wrote this one two years ago, and he remains the only Republican President of my lifetime I respected. Even his two most controversial decisions, to pardon Nixon and to deny the federal bailout of New York City, were the right thing to do, since Watergate had to be taken off the table, and the denial forced the City to make some tough decisions that soon showed Ford they were on the right track, and THEN he allowed the bailout. Unfortunately, he made Donald Rumsfeld his White House Chief of Staff, and then made him Secretary of Defense, and then made Dick Cheney Chief of Staff. Those are a pair of decisions the world is still paying for. But all is forgiven. Rest in peace, Mr. President.

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