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Song Parodies -> "Kelly Took the Hits"

Original Song Title:

"Bennie and the Jets"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"Kelly Took the Hits"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Ned Kelly a.k.a. That Dude What Made Armour To Fight The Cops Like A Badass. Let's delve a little deeper, shall we?
Ned, one of the last bushrangers
A highwayman Down Under, got his start as a teenager
Two prison terms, but then one night the cops came round
Indicted for attempted murder, mum's in the big house

Joe Byrne, Steve Hart and Ned's brother Dan then killed
Three policemen, shot down
K-K-K-K-K-Kelly took the hits
Declared outlaws by the government
Ned Kelly might've just been seen
As one up to no good, no Robin Hood
Two years evading for their big crime spree, oh-ho-oh-oh
K-K-K-Kelly took the hits

Kelly had seemed sympathetic
Despite their robb'ries, killing of Aaron Sherritt
Sure, he did write a long letter that put all
The blame on police persecution of the poor, but that just seems off

Then in 1880, he got in the shit
Failed to take a train down
K-K-K-K-K-Kelly took the hits
But it's this time that I mean that phrase
Ned Kelly, he had a good scheme
He took old plough mouldboards, stolen, not bought
And fashioned armour for his whole damn team, oh-ho-oh-oh
K-K-K-Kelly took the hits

Gun fight in Glenrowan, the whole team was nixed
Scheme didn't quite work out
K-K-K-K-K-Kelly took the hits
Rallies set up, tons of supporters
Ned Kelly still got no reprieve
He had to pay his due, hung by a noose
Were his last words "Such is life"? They could be, oh-ho-oh-oh
K-K-K-Kelly took the hits

Kelly, Kelly took the hits
Kelly, Ned Kelly, Kelly, Ned Kelly took the hits
Kelly, Ned Kelly, Ned Kelly, Kelly, Kelly took the hits
Kelly, Ned Kelly, Ned Kelly, Ned Kelly took the hits
Kelly, Ned Kelly, Ned Kelly, Ned Kelly took the hits
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly took the hits, hits, hits
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly took the hits

Kinda wish this song had an extra verse so I could get into everything Kelly did in those two years, oh well. Also, I totally want Ned Kelly in the next season of Epic Rap Battles of History if they make one. Also Elton John (versus Jesse James and Billy Joel, respectively).

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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

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User Comments

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Peregrin - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Conq, as an Aussie, I can attest to the fact that you have covered Ned Kelly really well here. Glad to see Glenrowan was thrown in. For anyone wondering what TCOP is talking about, and why "Kelly took the hits", search Google Images for "Ned Kelly Armour". Crude but effective (the armour).
Agrimorfee - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Interesting history lesson, thanks TCOP! Curious to see the 1970 movie starting Mick Jagger...any good? (I do see another film was made in 2003 with Heath Ledger, though)
Rob Arndt - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Too bad he left his legs exposed. He could have made loose hinged modular armor back to front! 555!
Peregrin - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Agri, worth a look at the movie for the novelty value of seeing Jagger in it - had you paid to see it at the movies you would have felt ripped off. Jagger's faux-Irish accident is cringe-worthy.
Matthias - April 30, 2018 - Report this comment
Never heard of this guy before so thank you for the history lesson!
Melanie Lee - May 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Sometimes I've written extra lyrics and put them in brackets. For now, you can put your extra lyrics here in the comments.
Stuart McArthur - May 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Nice to see a slice of Aussie history in here Conq. The legend has become greater than the man, who was probably not that great at all - but the armour and the Such Is Life - all great stuff. Can never resist a trip to the museum when passing thru Glenrowan. Cheers - 555
Peter Andersson - May 03, 2018 - Report this comment
An Australian Robin Hood? Hmmm.... I guess a Disney animated movie about that legend would have quite different metaforical animals than those in the British setting.
Rex - May 05, 2018 - Report this comment
I learned something today. And in that fun conqueror of parodies way.

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