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Song Parodies -> "Tiny Gangster"

Original Song Title:

"Tiny Dancer"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"Tiny Gangster"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Sometimes the local crime syndicate ain't all it's cracked to be...
Stree-eets are hazy, me-en a-and ladie-ies all runnin' like ma-a-ad
And I'm li-i-ike "Wait a whi-i-ile, tell me what's the problem, ma-a-an"
"Well, i-it seems a-a-a terrible ga-a-angster has made his demands
That this whole city's hi-is, we should be runnin' like a lit-up ma-a-an"

Peo-eople frea-eakin' i-in the stree-eets, where's thi-is man they're runnin' fro-o-om?
Can't the-e da-a-amnable ma-a-an be arsed to-o sho-ow up? An o-odd pla-a-an
See a-a ma-a-a-a-an in the fog, da-a-a-amn, wait, there's a whole lo-ot of 'em
Standi-in' stro-ong, besuited thro-ong, helps that they've all got tommy gu-u-uns

But oh, this can't be for real
They part, here's a man that sneers
"All o' youse, vamoose, ya hea-ear me?"
This has got to be a-a wheeze

You're scared of a tiny ga-a-a-angste-er?
Little squib doesn't reach my waist
Fine with bein' a stool-pi-i-i-igeo-eon
Not scared of his small frame toda-ay
That's a really tiny ga-a-a-angste-er
I've got tears right in my eyes, mate
Must be "Mr. Big" or so-o-o-omethi-in'
He's gotta compensate, oka-ay?

Do-oesn't faze me, mu-ust be-e crazy-y to run from this ma-a-an
Come on, ju-ust try-y-y to defy-y-y him, it should be quite the sna-a-ap
He's su-urrounde-e-ed by all his goo-oons wi-ith guns? Riot shields, man
Then run up quickly, hoi-oist him with ease, no more gangster, that is tha-a-at

Dropkick like you're on the field
Goons are near? Away they'll steer
When you use him as a shie-ield, see
Got dirt on you? Please wa-atch me

All freaked by this tiny ga-a-a-angste-er?
Not laughed harder in all my days
His threat's easily dimi-i-i-ini-ished
Nothin' to be afraid of, ma-ate
I'll go grab this tiny ga-a-a-angste-er
Goons are terrible marksmen, lame
Had more trouble with my frie-ie-ie-iend's ki-ids
'Neath my pits, where's the station, ma-ate?

Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

The first image that popped into my brain when I wrote "tiny gangster" was the Batman villain Ventriloquist, specifically his "puppet" Scarface. Just in case you needed to know that.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - August 23, 2016 - Report this comment
I've heard of "Say hello to my little friend," but this is ridiculous!

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