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Song Parodies -> "Try These Pants, Sir"

Original Song Title:

"Tiny Dancer"

Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"Try These Pants, Sir"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Blue jeans make me look so lazy. Seamstress checks my can
And my thighs. Then she smiles. Says, "You look like a suit man."
Haberdasher will take cash 'r credit cards in hand.
I'm not skinny, so she'll pimp me up, but charge me many grand.

A jeans freak, I used to be
Hanging off my hips of flab
In my back
You saw crack
The buns weren't hard—in fact, they'd sag.

Pantaloons man, when I'd stand.
There was nothing holding 'em.
No hooks on, they'd sink down
It was lurid—you'd see my bum.

She says, "You must try chenille
Yes, my dear, so have no fear—
No one will look at you queerly."
Then she says loudly, boldly:

"Bold those clothes—now try these pants, sir.
How about a shirt and tie, eh?
I say, you'd look sweet in linen
Do not worry, you will not look gay.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   12

User Comments

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Ashkicksass - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
2,867 points for using the word 'Haberdasher' in a parody. Not to mention the fact that the rest of it had me in stitches...
Mari D - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Is this what Elton's tailor said to him? Funny stuff, John!
Tim Mayfield - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
This one suits us, I think
Johnny D - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Naaah, you won't look gay ... you'll just be another fabulouthly dressed 100% straight Metrosexual.
John Barry - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Ash, Mari, Tim, JD.
alvin rhodes - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
these pants fit just fine...nice tailoring...5s
Arwen - January 11, 2005 - Report this comment
Yes, great of my all time favorite songs...=) Great parody!
Stuart McArthur - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
"Haberdasher will take cash 'r " just rolls off the page - excellent John - 555
Kristof Robertson - January 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Seamless and well-cut, with a finely tapered finish...555

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