Song Parodies -> Duelling Mangoes
| Original Song Title: | "Duelling Banjoes" |
| Original Performer: | Earl Flat and Lester Scruggs |
| Parody Song Title: | "Duelling Mangoes" |
| Parody Written by: | Stuart McArthur |
This one really benefits from being read against the OS which is available at http://www.stuartmcarthur.com/DuellingBanjoes.mp3........ or click on Duelling Banjoes at http://www.stuartmcarthur.com/mp3s.htm..and please imagine this being sung achipella-style by two bitchy mangoes.....(what?)
Yo!
what...?
You!
huh?
I'm...the...sweeter.....man...............go!
Don't...
go...
there...
I-am-much...sweet.....er!
You-are-eff.....in....not!
Yes I effin am
No you're effin not
I-am fat and firm
(like a pachyderm)
and I reign supreme
in...your...dreams
I - am - much more plump and ripe than you
You are not more plump and ripe than me
I am firmer on the stalk than you
you are not firmer stalk-wise than me
my colour is a gorgeous hue
gorgeous hue of ...what?
well the orchard owner's girl likes me
no the orchard owner's girl does not
but-she stopped a while under my tree
but-it doesn't mean she thinks you're hot
and-she almost picked me then and there
and-I'm wond-er-ing why she did not
she-would like to eat me anywhere
and-I'm wond-er-ing what made her stop
coz-she thought I could get riper still
and-you're so unripe you likely will
I will GET picked first
You will NOT get picked
I will GET picked first
You will GET ass-kicked
You're a VERY sickly-looking fruit......I am getting sick and tired of you
You are jealous of my perfect skin......it is shellfish-like and half caved-in
You should take back those nasty words
I won't take back a thing
so...
shut (no you) your big (shut up) fat trap (you're just) or else (jea-lous)
I'll shut (coz I'm) it for (the best) you You (I am) are in (a fine)
deny (ripe shade) -al of (of deep) the fact (and dark) that you're (crimson)
dark green (I'm not!) are too! am not. are too! am not. are too! am not
I'll snare a big-name brand one day
You're barely fit for canned puree
my bouquet has a scent of pear
I'd know your odour anywhere
your bumcrack aint as deep as mine
yeah duh! more mango meat inside
you're mean! you're being such a nerd
you're green, you're green, you're green, you turd
that is not true, that's nigh absurd
I'm telling you what I have heard
you're a lying ass
it's the simple truth
you are high on gas
I can give you proof
and I BET your pip is shrivelled dry......it is wet and thick, this pip of mine
and your warty things'll multiply......I will shortly be de-wartified
You should have shades of red by now
I do, I'll tell you how
coz...
I (oh sure) take in (you like) the sun (to think) because (I'm green) I'm not (to make)
in shade (yourself) like you (forget) and so (the fact) I got (you don't)
to get (have such) so ripe (a deep) and you (bumcrack) can't take (like my)
it you (fine gash) fat oaf (fat oaf) did you (did you) just call (just call) me fat (me fat)
I'm coming.coming.coming.coming -coming to fix YOU this time
oh no I'm tumbling - no I'm tumbling
tumbling tumbling down
(splat!)
what...?
You!
huh?
I'm...the...sweeter.....man...............go!
Don't...
go...
there...
I-am-much...sweet.....er!
You-are-eff.....in....not!
Yes I effin am
No you're effin not
I-am fat and firm
(like a pachyderm)
and I reign supreme
in...your...dreams
I - am - much more plump and ripe than you
You are not more plump and ripe than me
I am firmer on the stalk than you
you are not firmer stalk-wise than me
my colour is a gorgeous hue
gorgeous hue of ...what?
well the orchard owner's girl likes me
no the orchard owner's girl does not
but-she stopped a while under my tree
but-it doesn't mean she thinks you're hot
and-she almost picked me then and there
and-I'm wond-er-ing why she did not
she-would like to eat me anywhere
and-I'm wond-er-ing what made her stop
coz-she thought I could get riper still
and-you're so unripe you likely will
I will GET picked first
You will NOT get picked
I will GET picked first
You will GET ass-kicked
You're a VERY sickly-looking fruit......I am getting sick and tired of you
You are jealous of my perfect skin......it is shellfish-like and half caved-in
You should take back those nasty words
I won't take back a thing
so...
shut (no you) your big (shut up) fat trap (you're just) or else (jea-lous)
I'll shut (coz I'm) it for (the best) you You (I am) are in (a fine)
deny (ripe shade) -al of (of deep) the fact (and dark) that you're (crimson)
dark green (I'm not!) are too! am not. are too! am not. are too! am not
I'll snare a big-name brand one day
You're barely fit for canned puree
my bouquet has a scent of pear
I'd know your odour anywhere
your bumcrack aint as deep as mine
yeah duh! more mango meat inside
you're mean! you're being such a nerd
you're green, you're green, you're green, you turd
that is not true, that's nigh absurd
I'm telling you what I have heard
you're a lying ass
it's the simple truth
you are high on gas
I can give you proof
and I BET your pip is shrivelled dry......it is wet and thick, this pip of mine
and your warty things'll multiply......I will shortly be de-wartified
You should have shades of red by now
I do, I'll tell you how
coz...
I (oh sure) take in (you like) the sun (to think) because (I'm green) I'm not (to make)
in shade (yourself) like you (forget) and so (the fact) I got (you don't)
to get (have such) so ripe (a deep) and you (bumcrack) can't take (like my)
it you (fine gash) fat oaf (fat oaf) did you (did you) just call (just call) me fat (me fat)
I'm coming.coming.coming.coming -coming to fix YOU this time
oh no I'm tumbling - no I'm tumbling
tumbling tumbling down
(splat!)
http://www.stuartmcarthur.com/DuellingBanjoes.mp3
Your Vote Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for website. They appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.
|
Place Your Vote
|
| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
 | | | Pacing | | How Funny | | Overall Rating | | ||||||||||||||||||
| 1 | 0 |
|
1 |
|
0 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||
| 2 | 0 |
|
0 |
|
1 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||
| 3 | 0 |
|
0 |
|
1 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||
| 4 | 1 |
|
1 |
|
1 |
|
||||||||||||||||||||
| 5 | 33 |
|
32 |
|
31 |
|
User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
thanks Leo - yes I put some work into this one on a psycho-mango level - I wanted to understand WHY these mangoes hated each other so much - what was the root of their little mango insecurities that would make them want to act in this aggressive fashion? - and I reckon I now know each bango twang of the OS like the back of my hand ;-)
Highly original and DAMN funny, Stu. You raised the bar impossibly high for all instrumental parodies here. Super high 5's
Ah, the banjo tune from the movie 'Deliverance'!
Ripe, juicy and MOST impressive. It can be difficult enough taking on an instrumental OS, and this particular one is a heck of a challenge. The idea of them talking about being 'picked' is a sly nod to the original banjo concept. Masterful, hilarious job.
Ripe, juicy and MOST impressive. It can be difficult enough taking on an instrumental OS, and this particular one is a heck of a challenge. The idea of them talking about being 'picked' is a sly nod to the original banjo concept. Masterful, hilarious job.
Stu, clever guy that I am, I corrected my comment and requested that the first one be removed BEFORE I checked and saw that you'd already responded in the interim... so if Chucky goes ahead and deletes my first comment, your response may look a bit weird... ;-)
i'll think of mangos every time i hear this tune now...lol..5s
Far out and fantastic....Great job of lyric wording an instrumental as difficult as this one..
thanks, Dee...
thanks Leo for pointing out it's the theme tune from Deliverance (I meant to mention that) and yes, if comment 1 gets deleted it will confuse people for maybe a nanosecond now you've explained it for them - ta......
thanks alvin - hope so - at least there's no OS words to get in the way of my replacements
thanks Leo for pointing out it's the theme tune from Deliverance (I meant to mention that) and yes, if comment 1 gets deleted it will confuse people for maybe a nanosecond now you've explained it for them - ta......
thanks alvin - hope so - at least there's no OS words to get in the way of my replacements
ooh, your comment must've snuck in while I was typing, AFW - thanks a lot - and yes, I was a bit frightened of doing the fast bit, I must admit
Fruity and funny. Fives
Brilliant concept and execution! 555
"Deliverance", is that the old movie about four men taking a canoe trip down a river in a valley about to be flooded? With Burt Reynold as one of the four?
Besides that question, first I though this was gonna be about Gwyneth's 19:th and 20:th kids (Yellow Mango and Red Mango), you fruitcake, you!
Besides that question, first I though this was gonna be about Gwyneth's 19:th and 20:th kids (Yellow Mango and Red Mango), you fruitcake, you!
I had thought of parodying an instrumental, but scrapped that idea. It wouldn't have been this good anyways. 5s.
Wow! Great work Stu, very masterful! But when the mango hits the ground, does it squeal like a pig...? ;-D
I'll think of this grilliant parody next time I eat a Mango. Mmmm, I think I'll have one now...but WHICH one?
D'Oh! Sorry, I hit the "2" for "overall" when aiming for the voting button... which is a great shame as this is a wonderful idea brilliantly executed.
Not very phil-anthropic, Mr Alexander. But we can now coin a new AmIRight-ism: whenever we see an inappropriate vote, we can say that the writer's been 'Philled'.
thanks John.....thanks Rick
thanks Peter, and for remembering Gwyneth - hmm, I do seem to write about fruit, don't I....
thanks Red Ant - yeah it's totally different to do - the blank lyrical canvas is both good and bad, and the necessity of perfect beat pacing is a bit of a headache, but worth it when you've finished and you play it in the background - now I want to do it as a performance piece - two singers on stage, dressed as mangoes, singing achipella-style
thanks Merry - which makes me think - just like the f-word, rooted has two meanings - and although the mango wasn't rooted in the "Deliverance pig" sense when it hit the ground, it certainly WAS rooted!
thanks Mason - personally I always go for the mango with the shallowest bumcrack - for reasons mentioned in the parody ;-)
thanks, Phil, for owning up when you didn't need to, and stopping me from pondering the meaning of that unique creature, the 552!
thanks Peter, and for remembering Gwyneth - hmm, I do seem to write about fruit, don't I....
thanks Red Ant - yeah it's totally different to do - the blank lyrical canvas is both good and bad, and the necessity of perfect beat pacing is a bit of a headache, but worth it when you've finished and you play it in the background - now I want to do it as a performance piece - two singers on stage, dressed as mangoes, singing achipella-style
thanks Merry - which makes me think - just like the f-word, rooted has two meanings - and although the mango wasn't rooted in the "Deliverance pig" sense when it hit the ground, it certainly WAS rooted!
thanks Mason - personally I always go for the mango with the shallowest bumcrack - for reasons mentioned in the parody ;-)
thanks, Phil, for owning up when you didn't need to, and stopping me from pondering the meaning of that unique creature, the 552!
Splatterrific! 5's The mango tango plop drop!
This is so far out of left field, I'm wonderin' if your medication has stopped working again, Stu..;-) 555 of course
Very unique and interesting.
thanks Tim - that's either a new dance or a new sports energy drink
thanks Kristof - started working again you mean...;-)
thanks Royce :-) - I really appreciate the visit
thanks Kristof - started working again you mean...;-)
thanks Royce :-) - I really appreciate the visit
Very clever! I also liked the picked lines
thanks Jeff - much as I'd like to take credit for that clever double-meaning gag, alas it was unintentional!
(SOTM) Reading/Listening to this one again with a big ripe smile on my face, come final harvest time you are very likely to be picked among my first five, unless European Union regulations forbids me to go for Australian Mangoes. :-)
thanks for taking the trouble Peter - this one sort of depends on having the mp3 in the background to work :-)
[SOTM] So very very clever and equally as funny... this, imo, is a strong contender this month 555
[SOTM] Classic.
(SOTM) Well I had considered about a dozen solos/instrumentals for such a task but some of the picks were over 7 minutes in length with multiple instruments and too obscure anyway. This is great and I may re-consider that task in the future. Excellent work Stu.
SOTM--nice job...I have to join the "where in the hell does he come up with this stuff" crowd...=)
SOTM....still fantastic
(SOTM) I liked it. I still find it difficult to call this type of work an actual parody--more like an arrangement. Still worthy of commendation.
(SOTM) It takes a good one to make me laugh out loud, this one did
this is cute. i like the "eff-in" lines. i thought mangoes were well-behaved. i guess i learned something today
(SOTM) Well, it's certainly inspired. Nice job!
thanks DAK, Leo, Red Ant, Arwen, Dee, Agri, Mike, Dr Bob (well not all mangoes are badly behaved Doctor - all it takes is one bad mango to spoil the bunch, or an insecure one at least) - thanks Charlie
(SOTM) Still excellent, see above! I wonder, where will this man go next?
(SOTM) Still vine-ripened genius here!
"This one really benefits from being read against the OS" - well, if THAT isn't the site's biggest understatement. This is mind-blowingly creative. I maintained a goofy grin as I followed it all the way through, then as soon as the MP3 ended I had to start it over again. Even more goofy grinning the second time. I get lost in the really fast parts, but that's an indictment of the reader, not the author. This is ingenious. Oh, and it's effin funny, too.
(SOTM) Fantastic! I love parodies that put wacky words to instrumentals --- I've done some myself!
(SOTM) Tree 5's, I good example of dual mangling.
So yeah, at first I didn't like this very much, but it's been growing on me... so I guess that makes me the mango tree. Creative and brilliant, and great pacing besides. One of your best and one of the most original parodies I have seen, which is truly something.
(SOTM) wow. I'd like to do an instrumental parody one day but it'll be quite difficult to beat this
(SOTM) You know I love this, ya crazy freak!! ;-)
SOTM.. Bravo for making an instumental parody. And on mangoes of all things. Well done, Stuart. 555
Ha ha ha ha haaa! I shoulda read this one sooner. Terrific job, Stu. Clever, witty and hilarious. Go, man, go.
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3009.0;id=7404;image
A way, way, way belated job well done, this parody is ripe for the picking! After winning song of the Month in June, how about winning in my Going Insturmental song parody contest? At... http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,15567.0.html
Whew. So many people commented. But fantastic I say!
Fruit of the LOON !! ;-)
(INST) Eek! The freakin' mangoes return!! ;-)
(2005 SOTY) See above, and this still impresses me quite a bit.
(SOTY 06) see above
Very, very creative, and lots of good lines, particularly "canned puree."
I once thought of doing "Dueling Bozos" but decided I'd have to be out of my mind to think I could make a good parody of this song. That says nothing about you, though, since this is outstanding.
I can only imagine what sort of backwoods freak my fellow travelers here at O'Hare airport must think I am, as I sit here laughing at my laptop while "Dueling Banjos" plays through the speakers. (I forgot my headphones.) I'm only too happy to rerererevisit this one, s2art. Brilliant concept and execution. And lines like "fit and firm/Like a pachyderm" just don't come along every day.
SOTY: As time goes on, more people (including myself) are realizing just how good this is, and how difficult writing this to the OS must have been! I honestly believe that if you had the SOTM contest for this month again with the same songs, it would win, likely running away. And hey, it's mangoes!
Thankyou Jeff! (from the guy who beat it - grrr) This one absolutely NEEDS the OS playing in the background for it to work - otherwise it just looks like a shambles, and I'm rapt that more people are taking the time (you can right-click on the OS above to open it in a new window, anybody!! - hint hint!!)
thanks Spaff - banjo music out of a laptop is guaranteed to turn heads amongst the younger set ;-)
Dueling Bozos! That's a great idea Claude - do it! - I'd love to see that, especially with your stamp on it
thanks JJ, Agri, Red, Kristof, Johnny, Rick D, Matthias, Luke (groan), Mikey, Ethan, 2nz (double groan - or should that be "grown"), Spaff a"effin"gain ;-) Rick C,and Jeff again (triple groan)
thanks Spaff - banjo music out of a laptop is guaranteed to turn heads amongst the younger set ;-)
Dueling Bozos! That's a great idea Claude - do it! - I'd love to see that, especially with your stamp on it
thanks JJ, Agri, Red, Kristof, Johnny, Rick D, Matthias, Luke (groan), Mikey, Ethan, 2nz (double groan - or should that be "grown"), Spaff a"effin"gain ;-) Rick C,and Jeff again (triple groan)
Third Place
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,17591.0.html
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php/topic,17591.0.html
(ABC4) See above.
Still one of my favorites by you. Brilliant imaginiation.
(ABC4) Seems this one has gone around a fair bit. Once read, it's hard not to see why! Excellente, Stu!
(ABC4D) The mangoes return! One of your stone-cold classics, Stu: insanely clever when written, and holds up beautifully over 2 years later. Just....awesome.
See above...an old favorite =)
(ABC) Who oned this on Funny? Anyway, great job, very funny, I could have sworn I've read this one before.
(ABC) WOW. WOW WOW WOW. A positively herculean effort, Stu, and it is indeed impossible to read this without smiling so hard your face hurts. Brilliant!!!
ABC- Commented before, but it was nice to re-visit this classic. Very funny, Stu.
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
Link To This Page
The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/earlflatandlesterscruggs0.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.
This is view # 411
Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots album at Amazon.com
